DVS Offerings

Saturday, Dec 5
2:00 AM

Blades of Glory (DVS)

Perhaps nowhere in sports is the marriage of athleticism and grace more evident than in the arena of world champion pairs figure skating--the lifts, the jumps, the routines. It's an elegant world, a rarefied universe, a noble place populated by the crème de la crème of skating elite. Well, it used to be. When the macho, swaggering Chazz Michael Michaels takes to the rink, he is the rock star of the arena, leaving a trail of thrashed ice and shrieking female fans in his wake. The only competitor who can match Michaels' scores is the driven former child prodigy, Jimmy MacElroy. Spotted as a youth executing triple lutzes on the frozen pond of an orphanage, MacElroy was whisked away to days of endless training, and now stands as the picture of poise, the personification of the highest ideals of the men's sport. Michaels and MacElroy have met in finals rounds before, but their latest head-to-head at the World Championships--when they tie for first--is more than either one can bear, and their longstanding rivalry erupts into a no-holds-barred fight. The ensuing brawl not only sets fire to the World Championship's helpless mascot, but lands both athletes in hot water: Chazz and Jimmy are called before the sport's governing board, stripped of their gold medals and banned from the sport for life. Now, three-and-a-half years later, both men are still trying to find their way in a world without competitive skating. Michaels has devolved into a drunken party machine, skating as a costumed evil wizard in a kiddie ice review, and MacElroy has been banished to the shoe department of a chain sporting goods store. But then, inspiration (in the form of an over-friendly, former stalker of Jimmy's) strikes, and a loophole emerges. To skate again, all Chazz and Jimmy have to do is set aside their long festering hatred of one another and join forces--as the first male/male figure skating pair to compete in the history of the sport.

TV-14

5:00 AM

Blades of Glory (DVS)

Perhaps nowhere in sports is the marriage of athleticism and grace more evident than in the arena of world champion pairs figure skating--the lifts, the jumps, the routines. It's an elegant world, a rarefied universe, a noble place populated by the crème de la crème of skating elite. Well, it used to be. When the macho, swaggering Chazz Michael Michaels takes to the rink, he is the rock star of the arena, leaving a trail of thrashed ice and shrieking female fans in his wake. The only competitor who can match Michaels' scores is the driven former child prodigy, Jimmy MacElroy. Spotted as a youth executing triple lutzes on the frozen pond of an orphanage, MacElroy was whisked away to days of endless training, and now stands as the picture of poise, the personification of the highest ideals of the men's sport. Michaels and MacElroy have met in finals rounds before, but their latest head-to-head at the World Championships--when they tie for first--is more than either one can bear, and their longstanding rivalry erupts into a no-holds-barred fight. The ensuing brawl not only sets fire to the World Championship's helpless mascot, but lands both athletes in hot water: Chazz and Jimmy are called before the sport's governing board, stripped of their gold medals and banned from the sport for life. Now, three-and-a-half years later, both men are still trying to find their way in a world without competitive skating. Michaels has devolved into a drunken party machine, skating as a costumed evil wizard in a kiddie ice review, and MacElroy has been banished to the shoe department of a chain sporting goods store. But then, inspiration (in the form of an over-friendly, former stalker of Jimmy's) strikes, and a loophole emerges. To skate again, all Chazz and Jimmy have to do is set aside their long festering hatred of one another and join forces--as the first male/male figure skating pair to compete in the history of the sport.

TV-14

1:00 PM

Opposite, The (DVS)

Seinfeld

George learns success lies in doing the opposite of what he would normally do.

TV-PG

1:30 PM

Raincoats Part 1, The (DVS)

Seinfeld

Kramer's scheme to sell vintage raincoats backfires. George sells his dad's clothes.

TV-PG

2:00 PM

Blades of Glory (DVS)

Perhaps nowhere in sports is the marriage of athleticism and grace more evident than in the arena of world champion pairs figure skating--the lifts, the jumps, the routines. It's an elegant world, a rarefied universe, a noble place populated by the crème de la crème of skating elite. Well, it used to be. When the macho, swaggering Chazz Michael Michaels takes to the rink, he is the rock star of the arena, leaving a trail of thrashed ice and shrieking female fans in his wake. The only competitor who can match Michaels' scores is the driven former child prodigy, Jimmy MacElroy. Spotted as a youth executing triple lutzes on the frozen pond of an orphanage, MacElroy was whisked away to days of endless training, and now stands as the picture of poise, the personification of the highest ideals of the men's sport. Michaels and MacElroy have met in finals rounds before, but their latest head-to-head at the World Championships--when they tie for first--is more than either one can bear, and their longstanding rivalry erupts into a no-holds-barred fight. The ensuing brawl not only sets fire to the World Championship's helpless mascot, but lands both athletes in hot water: Chazz and Jimmy are called before the sport's governing board, stripped of their gold medals and banned from the sport for life. Now, three-and-a-half years later, both men are still trying to find their way in a world without competitive skating. Michaels has devolved into a drunken party machine, skating as a costumed evil wizard in a kiddie ice review, and MacElroy has been banished to the shoe department of a chain sporting goods store. But then, inspiration (in the form of an over-friendly, former stalker of Jimmy's) strikes, and a loophole emerges. To skate again, all Chazz and Jimmy have to do is set aside their long festering hatred of one another and join forces--as the first male/male figure skating pair to compete in the history of the sport.

TV-14

2:30 PM

Hamptons, The (DVS)

Seinfeld

Jerry's girlfriend sees George naked during a weekend at the beach.

TV-PG

4:30 PM

Double the Misery (DVS)

Misery Index, The

Find out what happens when a carnival ride goes wrong, what it means to get intimate with the Golden Gate Bridge, and why what happens in Vegas really should stay there in this special Twins-centric episode of The Misery Index.

TV-14

5:00 PM

Blades of Glory (DVS)

Perhaps nowhere in sports is the marriage of athleticism and grace more evident than in the arena of world champion pairs figure skating--the lifts, the jumps, the routines. It's an elegant world, a rarefied universe, a noble place populated by the crème de la crème of skating elite. Well, it used to be. When the macho, swaggering Chazz Michael Michaels takes to the rink, he is the rock star of the arena, leaving a trail of thrashed ice and shrieking female fans in his wake. The only competitor who can match Michaels' scores is the driven former child prodigy, Jimmy MacElroy. Spotted as a youth executing triple lutzes on the frozen pond of an orphanage, MacElroy was whisked away to days of endless training, and now stands as the picture of poise, the personification of the highest ideals of the men's sport. Michaels and MacElroy have met in finals rounds before, but their latest head-to-head at the World Championships--when they tie for first--is more than either one can bear, and their longstanding rivalry erupts into a no-holds-barred fight. The ensuing brawl not only sets fire to the World Championship's helpless mascot, but lands both athletes in hot water: Chazz and Jimmy are called before the sport's governing board, stripped of their gold medals and banned from the sport for life. Now, three-and-a-half years later, both men are still trying to find their way in a world without competitive skating. Michaels has devolved into a drunken party machine, skating as a costumed evil wizard in a kiddie ice review, and MacElroy has been banished to the shoe department of a chain sporting goods store. But then, inspiration (in the form of an over-friendly, former stalker of Jimmy's) strikes, and a loophole emerges. To skate again, all Chazz and Jimmy have to do is set aside their long festering hatred of one another and join forces--as the first male/male figure skating pair to compete in the history of the sport.

TV-14

6:00 PM

Christmas Story, A (DVS)

Youngster Ralphie Parker spends most of his time dodging a bully and dreaming of his ideal Christmas gift, a Red Ryder air rifle. Frequently at odds with his cranky dad but comforted by his doting mother, Ralphie struggles to make it to Christmas Day with his glasses and his hopes intact.

TV-PG

8:00 PM

Wonder (DVS)

Born with facial differences that, up until now, have prevented him from going to a mainstream school, Auggie Pullman becomes the most unlikely of heroes when he enters the local fifth grade. As his family, his new classmates, and the larger community all struggle to discover their compassion and acceptance, Auggie's extraordinary journey will unite them all and prove you can't blend in when you were born to stand out. Based on the novel by R.J. Palacio.

TV-PG

9:00 PM

Christmas Story, A (DVS)

Youngster Ralphie Parker spends most of his time dodging a bully and dreaming of his ideal Christmas gift, a Red Ryder air rifle. Frequently at odds with his cranky dad but comforted by his doting mother, Ralphie struggles to make it to Christmas Day with his glasses and his hopes intact.

TV-PG

11:00 PM

Jerry Maguire (DVS)

Jerry Maguire is a man who knows the score. As a top agent at Sports Management International, Jerry is unquestionably master of his universe. Trouble is, Jerry's mind, mouth and soul are usually on automatic pilot. He's good at friendship, but (as his numerous ex-girlfriends testify) bad at intimacy. Still, there's absolutely nothing wrong with Jerry that a sudden dose of failure can't cure. A week after spontaneously writing a stirring, visionary mission statement for SMI entitled "The Things We Think And Do Not Say: The Future of Our Business," he's unceremoniously fired. Stripped of his job and a good measure of his identity, the tenacious but hanging-by-a-thread Jerry is forced to start from scratch. He's joined on his journey to redemption by two unlikely allies: Rod Tidwell, a second-tier wide receiver for the Arizona Cardinals; and Dorothy Boyd, a wistful 26-year-old single mother who departs her accountancy position with SMI for a very uncertain future with her new boss.

TV-14

Sunday, Dec 6
2:00 AM

Jerry Maguire (DVS)

Jerry Maguire is a man who knows the score. As a top agent at Sports Management International, Jerry is unquestionably master of his universe. Trouble is, Jerry's mind, mouth and soul are usually on automatic pilot. He's good at friendship, but (as his numerous ex-girlfriends testify) bad at intimacy. Still, there's absolutely nothing wrong with Jerry that a sudden dose of failure can't cure. A week after spontaneously writing a stirring, visionary mission statement for SMI entitled "The Things We Think And Do Not Say: The Future of Our Business," he's unceremoniously fired. Stripped of his job and a good measure of his identity, the tenacious but hanging-by-a-thread Jerry is forced to start from scratch. He's joined on his journey to redemption by two unlikely allies: Rod Tidwell, a second-tier wide receiver for the Arizona Cardinals; and Dorothy Boyd, a wistful 26-year-old single mother who departs her accountancy position with SMI for a very uncertain future with her new boss.

TV-14

3:00 AM

It Messes With Your Head! (DVS)

Misery Index, The

What does Murr look like with a full head of hair, what's it like to have 250 orgasms in a single day, and who likes to use handcuffs in the bedroom? Find out as our contestants battle for 30k in this kinky episode of The Misery Index.

TV-14

3:30 AM

Double the Misery (DVS)

Misery Index, The

Find out what happens when a carnival ride goes wrong, what it means to get intimate with the Golden Gate Bridge, and why what happens in Vegas really should stay there in this special Twins-centric episode of The Misery Index.

TV-14

4:00 AM

And the Hidden Stash (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

Max joins Caroline on her visit to a white-collar prison to see her father, Martin Channing, and he encourages them to purchase a particular keepsake at the Channing estate auction.

TV-14

4:30 AM

And the Pearl Necklace (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

When Max and Caroline met Martha Stewart at a gala event and gave her one of their cupcakes to taste, they were thrilled to get a positive response! Now, Max and Caroline attempt to keep the faith that Martha Stewart will call and help support their cupcake business. Meanwhile, Caroline loses a lucky keepsake.

TV-14

6:00 AM

It Messes With Your Head! (DVS)

Misery Index, The

What does Murr look like with a full head of hair, what's it like to have 250 orgasms in a single day, and who likes to use handcuffs in the bedroom? Find out as our contestants battle for 30k in this kinky episode of The Misery Index.

TV-14

6:30 AM

Double the Misery (DVS)

Misery Index, The

Find out what happens when a carnival ride goes wrong, what it means to get intimate with the Golden Gate Bridge, and why what happens in Vegas really should stay there in this special Twins-centric episode of The Misery Index.

TV-14

7:00 AM

And the Hidden Stash (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

Max joins Caroline on her visit to a white-collar prison to see her father, Martin Channing, and he encourages them to purchase a particular keepsake at the Channing estate auction.

TV-14

7:30 AM

And the Pearl Necklace (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

When Max and Caroline met Martha Stewart at a gala event and gave her one of their cupcakes to taste, they were thrilled to get a positive response! Now, Max and Caroline attempt to keep the faith that Martha Stewart will call and help support their cupcake business. Meanwhile, Caroline loses a lucky keepsake.

TV-14

12:00 PM

Engagement, The (DVS)

Seinfeld

In an effort to grow up, George proposes marriage to former girlfriend Susan.

TV-PG

12:30 PM

Postponement, The (DVS)

Seinfeld

Feeling overwhelmed, George wants to postpone marrying Susan.

TV-PG

1:30 PM

Wink, The (DVS)

Seinfeld

An uncontrollable wink creates problems for George and Kramer.

TV-PG

3:00 PM

Paddington 2 (DVS)

Settled in with the Brown family, Paddington the bear is a popular member of the community who spreads joy and marmalade wherever he goes. One fine day, he spots a pop-up book in an antique shop -- the perfect present for his beloved aunt's 100th birthday. When a thief steals the prized book, Paddington embarks on an epic quest to unmask the culprit before Aunt Lucy's big celebration. Based on the books by Michael Bond.

TV-PG

3:30 PM

It Messes With Your Head! (DVS)

Misery Index, The

What does Murr look like with a full head of hair, what's it like to have 250 orgasms in a single day, and who likes to use handcuffs in the bedroom? Find out as our contestants battle for 30k in this kinky episode of The Misery Index.

TV-14

6:00 PM

Paddington 2 (DVS)

Settled in with the Brown family, Paddington the bear is a popular member of the community who spreads joy and marmalade wherever he goes. One fine day, he spots a pop-up book in an antique shop -- the perfect present for his beloved aunt's 100th birthday. When a thief steals the prized book, Paddington embarks on an epic quest to unmask the culprit before Aunt Lucy's big celebration. Based on the books by Michael Bond.

TV-PG

7:00 PM

Dr. Seuss' How the Grinch Stole Christmas! (DVS)

Bitter and hateful, the Grinch is irritated at the thought of the nearby village having a happy time celebrating Christmas. So disguised as Santa Claus with his dog Max made to look like a reindeer, he raids the village to steal all the Christmas things.

TV-G

7:30 PM

Elf's Story: The Elf on the Shelf, An (DVS)

Chippy is assigned to a family that includes a boy who is questioning the magic of Christmas. When Chippy finds the assignment a bit challenging, his good friends, Santa, and an unexpected child help him remember why his job is important!

TV-G

8:00 PM

Wonder (DVS)

Born with facial differences that, up until now, have prevented him from going to a mainstream school, Auggie Pullman becomes the most unlikely of heroes when he enters the local fifth grade. As his family, his new classmates, and the larger community all struggle to discover their compassion and acceptance, Auggie's extraordinary journey will unite them all and prove you can't blend in when you were born to stand out. Based on the novel by R.J. Palacio.

TV-PG

10:00 PM

Dr. Seuss' How the Grinch Stole Christmas! (DVS)

Bitter and hateful, the Grinch is irritated at the thought of the nearby village having a happy time celebrating Christmas. So disguised as Santa Claus with his dog Max made to look like a reindeer, he raids the village to steal all the Christmas things.

TV-G

11:00 PM

Wonder (DVS)

Born with facial differences that, up until now, have prevented him from going to a mainstream school, Auggie Pullman becomes the most unlikely of heroes when he enters the local fifth grade. As his family, his new classmates, and the larger community all struggle to discover their compassion and acceptance, Auggie's extraordinary journey will unite them all and prove you can't blend in when you were born to stand out. Based on the novel by R.J. Palacio.

TV-PG

Monday, Dec 7
2:30 AM

Paddington 2 (DVS)

Settled in with the Brown family, Paddington the bear is a popular member of the community who spreads joy and marmalade wherever he goes. One fine day, he spots a pop-up book in an antique shop -- the perfect present for his beloved aunt's 100th birthday. When a thief steals the prized book, Paddington embarks on an epic quest to unmask the culprit before Aunt Lucy's big celebration. Based on the books by Michael Bond.

TV-PG

5:30 AM

Paddington 2 (DVS)

Settled in with the Brown family, Paddington the bear is a popular member of the community who spreads joy and marmalade wherever he goes. One fine day, he spots a pop-up book in an antique shop -- the perfect present for his beloved aunt's 100th birthday. When a thief steals the prized book, Paddington embarks on an epic quest to unmask the culprit before Aunt Lucy's big celebration. Based on the books by Michael Bond.

TV-PG

12:00 PM

One with Joey's Fridge, The (DVS)

Friends

Ross worries when his student/girlfriend goes on vacation with her wild friends. Meanwhile, Joey's refrigerator breaks down.

TV-PG

12:30 PM

One with Mac and C.H.E.E.S.E., The (DVS)

Friends

Primarily composed of clips from earlier shows, Joey auditions for a major television role but Chandler almost ruins everything.

TV-PG

1:00 PM

One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad, The (DVS)

Friends

Ross is nervous about meeting Paul, Elizabeth's dad, and invites the gang to the coffeehouse for moral support.

TV-PG

1:30 PM

One Where Paul's the Man, The (DVS)

Friends

Elizabeth and Ross decide to hide their relationship from her father and head up to his cabin for the weekend.

TV-PG

2:00 PM

One with the Ring, The (DVS)

Friends

Phoebe helps Chandler pick out an engagement ring for Monica.

TV-PG

2:30 PM

One with the Proposal Part 1, The (DVS)

Friends

Chandler plans to propose to Monica.

TV-PG

3:00 PM

One with the Proposal Part 2, The (DVS)

Friends

Monica asks Chandler to be her husband.

TV-PG

3:30 PM

One with Monica's Thunder, The (DVS)

Friends

Monica excitedly reveals her good news to everyone but Rachel and Ross upstage her. Chandler has trouble making love.

TV-PG

4:00 PM

Oedipal Panties (DVS)

American Dad

When Stan's mom, Betty, gets dumped by a boyfriend for the umpteenth time, she comes running to Stan for support. Feeling threatened by her always-visiting mother-in-law, Francine is determined to cut Stan's umbilical cord and figure out what keeps going wrong with the men in Betty's life. Like a regular Cagney & Lacey, Francine and Roger go undercover to solve the case. Meanwhile, Klaus gives Steve the ick.

TV-14

4:30 PM

Widowmaker (DVS)

American Dad

Francine pushes Stan to open up to her emotionally, but she gets more than she bargained for when he tells her that he killed her best friend Julie's husband. Meanwhile, Roger plays psychiatrist to help them work through their issues.

TV-14

5:00 PM

Red October Sky (DVS)

American Dad

Stan goes in search of a former KGB agent, Sergei, and is shocked to find that the man is his new next-door neighbor and that Sergei has already turned Steve into a communist. Meanwhile, Roger and Klaus head to France for a little R&R but their trip takes a turn for the worst when Klaus gets busted for drug smuggling.

TV-14

5:30 PM

Office Spaceman (DVS)

American Dad

When the CIA initiates an Alien Task Force, a peculiar twist of fate puts Roger in charge of the task force in disguise, who marks Stan as an alien to protect his own identity. Meanwhile Francine comes to grips with being left-handed.

TV-14

6:00 PM

Father of the Bob (DVS)

Bob's Burgers

At Bob's father's Christmas party, Bob and "Big Bob" rehash an old argument and try to outdo each other in the kitchen. Meanwhile, the kids compete to find the best gift for their dad.

TV-PG

6:30 PM

Tina Tailor Soldier Spy (DVS)

Bob's Burgers

Tina goes undercover in her old Thundergirls troop to find the mole who is giving away their cookie secrets. Meanwhile, tired of the kids counting her gray hairs, Linda decides to go blonde. But when she starts making dumb mistakes at work, Bob worries that being blonde has gone to her head!

TV-PG

7:00 PM

Midday Run (DVS)

Bob's Burgers

When Tina is up for a big hall monitor promotion, she is determined to do whatever it takes to nab the powerful job, so she enlists the help of Gene and Louise. Meanwhile, back at the restaurant, Linda gets artsy and begins to decorate the walls with customer artwork on napkins.

TV-PG

7:30 PM

Speakeasy Rider (DVS)

Bob's Burgers

Tina, Gene and Louise are ready to put the pedal to the metal when they join a go-kart league. Meanwhile, back at the restaurant, Bob and Teddy partner up to serve Teddy's home-brewed beer.

TV-PG

8:00 PM

Late Afternoon in the Garden of Bob and Louise (DVS)

Bob's Burgers

In order to become an accepted member of the Community Garden, Bob must make a deal that results in giving Louise's arch enemy a job at the restaurant. Father and daughter are at odds and a choice must be made.

TV-PG

8:30 PM

Tom Tucker: The Man and His Dream (DVS)

Family Guy

When Peter decides to be a famous actor, he becomes Tom Tucker's agent as his first step toward stardom. Meanwhile, Chris dates a girl who looks disturbingly like a member of the Griffin household.

TV-14

9:00 PM

Be Careful What You Fish For (DVS)

Family Guy

When Peter and the guys try to salvage a sunken Mercedes-Benz, Peter half-heartedly promises a favor to a helpful dolphin (guest voice Ricky Gervais). Soon the dolphin moves to Quahog, outstays his welcome at Peter's and moves into Cleveland's house across the street. Peter tries to reunite the dolphin with his ex-wife in hopes that he'll return to the ocean, but his plan backfires and the whole dolphin family moves into Cleveland's.

TV-14

9:30 PM

Burning Down the Bayit (DVS)

Family Guy

Overwhelmed with financial troubles, Mort asks Peter and Quagmire to help him save his pharmacy. However, things take a turn for the worse when the trio decides to burn it down to collect insurance money.

TV-14

10:00 PM

Killer Queen (DVS)

Family Guy

When Peter and Chris go away to fat camp, they cross paths with a serial killer who targets overweight kids. Meanwhile, Stewie is traumatized by the frightening cover of a Queen album.

TV-14

10:30 PM

Forget Me Not (DVS)

Family Guy

After a car accident, Peter, Brian, Joe, and Quagmire wake up in a hospital with no memory and discover that they're the last people left on Earth.

TV-14

11:00 PM

You Can't Do That on Television, Peter (DVS)

Family Guy

After Peter's favorite children's television show gets cancelled, he takes matters into his own hands by creating and starring in his own show for kids. Meanwhile, Meg begins an internship at the hospital with Dr. Hartman.

TV-14

11:30 PM

Mr. and Mrs. Stewie (DVS)

Family Guy

Stewie meets a little girl who might be his soulmate; Lois buys twin beds after Peter repeatedly crushes her in his sleep.

TV-14

Tuesday, Dec 8
12:00 AM

Leggo My Meg-O (DVS)

Family Guy

Stewie and Brian attempt to track down Meg after she's abducted in Paris by sex slave operatives.

TV-14

12:30 AM

Tea Peter (DVS)

Family Guy

Peter joins the Tea Party but doesn't discover until it's too late that Carter Pewterschmidt is using the party to get rid of government for his own selfish motives.

TV-14

1:00 AM

American Data? (DVS)

American Dad

Steve and the boys take part in a prison experiment to earn some cash. Meanwhile, Stan deals with the death of his CIA groundskeeper friend.

TV-14

1:30 AM

Salute Your Sllort (DVS)

American Dad

Steve's efforts to befriend a Swedish exchange student backfire in a big way; The family calls in an animal behaviorist to deal with Klaus.

TV-14

2:30 AM

Hot Tub, The (DVS)

Seinfeld

Elaine's house guest arrives for the city's marathon; Kramer gets a hot tub.

TV-PG

3:00 AM

Soup Nazi, The (DVS)

Seinfeld

Jerry's favorite soup vendor won't serve his new girlfriend.

TV-PG

4:00 AM

Slump, The (DVS)

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

When Jake starts accumulating unsolved cases, the other detectives worry his losing streak will rub off on them; Amy, Rosa and Gina run a program for at-risk youth; Boyle helps Sgt. Jeffords with a case.

TV-14

4:30 AM

M.E. Time (DVS)

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Jake hits on an attractive medical examiner at a crime scene and holds up the autopsy report; Amy's purse-snatching case is stalled when the sketch artist is out sick.

TV-14

5:00 AM

Halloween (DVS)

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Unhappy Amy must wear a costume to go on patrol with Charles; Jake bets Holt he can steal his Medal of Valor.

TV-14

5:30 AM

Sal's Pizza (DVS)

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

When Sal's Pizza burns down, Jake goes out of his way to disprove the fire marshal's assumption that the owner set the fire; a computer virus exposes the precinct members' Internet browser histories.

TV-14

6:00 AM

And the Hold-Up (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

Max and Caroline show their true colors when the diner gets robbed. Meanwhile, everyone sees a surprising new side of Han.

TV-14

6:30 AM

And the Cupcake War (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

Max and Caroline put their baking skills to the test when they audition to be contestants on the hit cooking show Cupcake Wars.

TV-14

7:00 AM

And the Pre-Approved Credit Card (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

A new pre-approved credit card causes strife between Max and Caroline, who have different opinions on what to charge on it. Meanwhile, Earl's estranged son, Darius, arrives in New York with hopes of becoming a stand-up comedian.

TV-14

7:30 AM

And the Candy Manwich (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

Andy, a cute candy store owner, has eyes for Caroline, but she's too embarrassed to see him after a humiliating experience at his candy store.

TV-14

10:30 AM

One with Phoebe's Cookies, The (DVS)

Friends

Monica desperately tries to figure out a secret cookie recipe. Chandler fails to impress Monica's father.

TV-PG

1:00 PM

One with Rachel's Book, The (DVS)

Friends

Monica is outraged to find out what her parents did with her wedding fund. Joey discovers Rachel's late-night reading material.

TV-PG

1:30 PM

One with Phoebe's Cookies, The (DVS)

Friends

Monica desperately tries to figure out a secret cookie recipe. Chandler fails to impress Monica's father.

TV-PG

2:00 PM

One with Rachel's Assistant, The (DVS)

Friends

Rachel is in a quandary when a sexy but unqualified man applies to be her assistant. Chandler, Monica and Ross tell embarrassing secrets about one another.

TV-PG

2:30 PM

One with the Engagement Picture, The (DVS)

Friends

Joey tries to teach Chandler how to smile for the camera. Phoebe and Ross bicker over their divorcing friends.

TV-PG

3:00 PM

One with the Nap Partners, The (DVS)

Friends

Rachel and Phoebe compete to be Monica's maid of honor but Monica doesn't want to make the decision. Chandler tries to apologize to a girlfriend from his youth.

TV-PG

3:30 PM

One with Ross's Library Book, The (DVS)

Friends

Chandler's former girlfriend manipulates Chandler and Monica. Rachel and Phoebe meddle in Joey's relationship.

TV-PG

4:00 PM

One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs, The (DVS)

Friends

Chandler's irrational fear causes problems when Phoebe brings home a cute dog. Rachel's assistant gives her a Thanksgiving surprise.

TV-PG

4:30 PM

One with All the Candy, The (DVS)

Friends

Rachel gets in trouble for dating her assistant. Monica tries to become friendlier with her neighbors. Phoebe needs lessons in riding a bike.

TV-PG

5:00 PM

One with the Holiday Armadillo, The (DVS)

Friends

Ross teaches Ben about Chanukah. Phoebe worries that Rachel prefers living with Joey .

TV-PG

5:30 PM

One with All the Cheesecakes, The (DVS)

Friends

Phoebe's former boyfriend returns for one night only but Joey could ruin their plans. Monica plots revenge on her cousin's wedding day.

TV-PG

6:00 PM

One Where They're Up All Night, The (DVS)

Friends

Monica falls asleep during sex. Rachel argues with Tag. Ross and Joey get stranded on the roof.

TV-PG

6:30 PM

One Where Rosita Dies, The (DVS)

Friends

Phoebe becomes involved with a suicidal office worker. Rachel breaks Joey's favorite chair. Monica's beloved childhood belongings are destroyed.

TV-PG

7:00 PM

Stanny Slickers II: The Legend of Ollie's Gold (DVS)

American Dad

After officially being declared dead due to an accident, Stan comes back to life and realizes he dreams of leaving a legacy on the world. He excavates his home in search of Ollie North's Contra-band buried treasure.

TV-14

7:30 PM

Choosey Wives Choose Smith (DVS)

American Dad

Stan becomes jealous when he finds out Francine was once engaged to a pilot whose plane crashed, and she seemed to settle for Stan before learning her former fiancé was still alive. Stan and Roger try to track the man down, while Francine must choose between her husband and her lost love.

TV-14

8:00 PM

One That Got Away, The (DVS)

American Dad

Roger discovers one of his personas has taken on a life of his own. Back at home, the Smith family becomes addicted to the 1970s electronic game Simon.

TV-14

8:30 PM

Spring Break-Up (DVS)

American Dad

With Francine gone to visit her parents, Roger holds a Spring Break blowout at the Smith house. During the festivities, Stan falls for a Spring Break Buddy and Steve is on the verge of losing his virginity.

TV-14

9:00 PM

Sibling Rivalry (DVS)

Family Guy

After a pregnancy scare, Peter reluctantly agrees to get a vasectomy.

TV-14

9:30 PM

Patriot Games (DVS)

Family Guy

At his high school reunion, Peter pretends to be a millionaire, but the truth comes out when he meets Tom Brady and loses all self-control.

TV-14

10:00 PM

Fetal Kick Catalyst, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

Feeling his fetal offspring kick sends Howard on a baby-items buying binge with Raj; Sheldon and Amy host a brunch in their new digs; and Penny, by virtue of her virtuoso performance in "Serial Apist," is invited to a sci-fi convention.

TV-PG

10:30 PM

Veracity Elasticity, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

In order to remain Sheldon's roomie, Amy fibs about repairs being made to her apartment. Later, they present a episode of "Fun with Flags" in Penny's apartment.

TV-14

11:00 PM

Brain Bowl Incubation, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

A successful gene experiment leaves Sheldon excited to procreate with Amy, and he pulls out all stops to get her on board. Meanwhile, Raj is reluctant to reveal what the new woman in his life does for a living.

TV-PG

11:30 PM

Geology Elevation, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

A geologist coworker's MacArthur Genius fellowship award leaves Sheldon stone cold jealous. Meanwhile, Howard stumbles upon a remote-control Stephen Hawking action figure that he invented. Hawking appears as himself.

TV-PG

Wednesday, Dec 9
12:00 AM

Property Division Collision, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

A great divide develops between Sheldon and Leonard when it comes time to divvy up their shared belongings. Meanwhile, with Bernadette heading into her pregnancy homestretch, Raj and Stuart battle to be the one providing her the most help.

TV-PG

12:30 AM

Birthday Synchronicity, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

The Wolowitz baby arrives, while Sheldon and Amy celebrate Amy's birthday.

TV-PG

1:00 AM

Romance Recalibration, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

After a marital disagreement, Penny takes off for a spa weekend with Amy, and Sheldon steps in to play peacemaker for the squabbling newlyweds. Meanwhile, Howard and Raj do battle with a noisy floor in the baby's room.

TV-PG

1:30 AM

It's Gonna Be a Bloodbath (DVS)

Misery Index, The

Sweat bees in the eyes, one girl's battle with the zombie apocalypse and why you should never inject your privates with petroleum jelly! It's all happening on this hilarious episode of The Misery Index.

TV-14

2:30 AM

It's Gonna Be a Bloodbath (DVS)

Misery Index, The

Sweat bees in the eyes, one girl's battle with the zombie apocalypse and why you should never inject your privates with petroleum jelly! It's all happening on this hilarious episode of The Misery Index.

TV-14

3:00 AM

Double the Misery (DVS)

Misery Index, The

Find out what happens when a carnival ride goes wrong, what it means to get intimate with the Golden Gate Bridge, and why what happens in Vegas really should stay there in this special Twins-centric episode of The Misery Index.

TV-14

4:00 AM

Old School (DVS)

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Jake gets to spend the day with his hero, a former crime reporter; Terry and Charles work with Rosa on how she comes across on the witness stand.

TV-14

4:30 AM

Thanksgiving (DVS)

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

When Holt and Jake must leave Amy's Thanksgiving dinner to catch a perp, Boyle steps in to save the day.

TV-14

5:00 AM

Christmas (DVS)

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

When Holt starts getting death threats, Jake takes charge of his security; Amy tries to get a precinct Christmas photo; Terry gets his mojo back.

TV-14

5:30 AM

Bet, The (DVS)

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Jake and Amy settle their ongoing bet about who can make more arrests; Charles reveals what he really thinks about his colleagues while under the influence of pain medication.

TV-14

6:00 AM

And the Three Boys with Wood (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

Max and Caroline enlist two Amish boys who are exploring the modern world to build a barn for Chestnut. Meanwhile, Candy Andy discovers Caroline's ex-billionaire identity.

TV-14

6:30 AM

And the Egg Special (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

Max and Caroline cook up a surprising fundraising solution when a potential storefront for Max's Homemade Cupcakes becomes available for rent.

TV-14

7:00 AM

And the New Boss (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

When Max and Caroline hire an intern, Ruth, to help take care of some of the dirty work in preparation of opening their new cupcake shop, Max has trouble with her new managerial role.

TV-14

7:30 AM

And the Big Opening (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

Max and Caroline host a grand opening celebration at their new cupcake shop. To show off her success, Max invites her former flame Johnny and her ex-boyfriend Robbie.

TV-14

1:00 PM

One Where They All Turn Thirty, The (DVS)

Friends

Rachel's 30th birthday prompts the friends to reminisce about their own 30th birthdays.

TV-PG

1:30 PM

One with Joey's New Brain, The (DVS)

Friends

Joey's character on a daytime drama becomes more prominent to the chagrin of the show's diva star. Phoebe and Rachel argue over who should return a sexy man's misplaced cell phone to him.

TV-PG

2:00 PM

One with the Truth About London, The (DVS)

Friends

Chandler finds out who Monica really wanted to have sex with on the night they became lovers. Ross is furious after Rachel teaches Ben practical jokes.

TV-PG

2:30 PM

One with the Cheap Wedding Dress, The (DVS)

Friends

Monica battles another shopper for the perfect wedding dress. Ross and Joey compete for the same woman.

TV-PG

3:00 PM

One with Joey's Award, The (DVS)

Friends

Joey overreacts at a daytime drama awards show.

TV-PG

3:30 PM

One with Ross & Monica's Cousin, The (DVS)

Friends

Monica's gorgeous cousin unwittingly wreaks havoc on Chandler and Ross. Rachel and Phoebe hastily plan a surprise bridal party for Monica.

TV-PG

4:00 PM

One with Rachel's Big Kiss, The (DVS)

Friends

Rachel reveals a titillating secret about her and a former sorority sister. Ross and Chandler compete for wedding tuxedos.

TV-PG

4:30 PM

One with the Vows, The (DVS)

Friends

As Monica and Chandler prepare their wedding vows, they and their friends reminisce.

TV-PG

5:00 PM

One with Chandler's Dad, The (DVS)

Friends

Chandler confronts his estranged cross-dressing father. Rachel gets into trouble driving Monica's Porsche.

TV-PG

5:30 PM

One with Monica & Chandler's Wedding Part 1, The (DVS)

Friends

On the eve of the wedding, Ross searches for missing Chandler, who has doubts, while the girls distract unsuspecting Monica.

TV-PG

6:00 PM

One with Monica & Chandler's Wedding Part 2, The (DVS)

Friends

Monica remains blissfully unaware of the potential disasters on her wedding day.

TV-PG

6:30 PM

One After I Do, The (DVS)

Friends

The reception following Monica and Chandler's wedding is almost upstaged by the news that a member of the group might be pregnant.

TV-PG

7:00 PM

One Little Word (DVS)

American Dad

When Stan becomes his boss' new advisor, he feels like he can't say no to anything, not even outrageous personal requests. But when Francine gets involved in the situation and his annoying "yes-man" antics ruin her Valentine's Day vacation, she does everything in her power to force him to say "no".

TV-14

7:30 PM

Escape from Pearl Bailey (DVS)

American Dad

Steve plots revenge against Lisa Silver and the cool kids after Debbie loses her bid to become student council president. But when the cool kids stage a counterattack, will Steve and his friends survive?

TV-14

8:00 PM

1600 Candles (DVS)

American Dad

The Smiths' plans to celebrate Roger's 1,600th birthday are sidetracked when Steve announces he's finally going through puberty. Ever fearful of the thought of a Steve with raging hormones, Stan and Francine try to bypass the pains by having experimental medicine injected into Steve's head.

TV-14

8:30 PM

Pulling Double Booty (DVS)

American Dad

Hayley's boyfriend, Jeff, breaks up with her. After going on a short rampage through the mall after the break-up, Hayley falls for Stan's body double, Bill, from the CIA. Things take a bizarre twist when the double begins hitting on Francine. Meanwhile, Roger and Steve get their first summer job at a Chinese chicken hatchery.

TV-14

9:00 PM

Deep Throats (DVS)

Family Guy

When Meg lands an internship with Mayor West, Brian argues that he is corrupt; a local talent show brings Peter and Lois back to their folk-singing days.

TV-14

9:30 PM

Peterotica (DVS)

Family Guy

After reading an erotic novel, Peter decides to write one of his own and gets Carter to publish it.

TV-14

10:00 PM

Emotion Detection Automation, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

Sheldon learns about an MIT invention that can help read people's emotions and decides to test it. Meanwhile, Leonard has trouble hiding his emotions when Penny announces her brother is going to visit; and Raj gathers former girlfriends to ask for their dating advice.

TV-PG

10:30 PM

Locomotion Reverberation, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

With Sheldon hindering progress on the guidance-system project, Leonard and Stuart figure the only way they can get back on track is to engineer a distraction by getting him tickets to a historic railroad. Penny and Amy spirit away new-mommy Bernadette for a girls' night out, leaving baby Halley in the hands of Raj and Stuart.

TV-PG

11:00 PM

Allowance Evaporation, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

Amy is incensed when she discovers Sheldon has shared intimate relationship information with people at the University; and Raj is knocked for a loop when his father stops sending financial support.

TV-PG

11:30 PM

Comic-Con Conundrum, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

Without financial backing from his father, Raj finds himself in a cash crunch and turns to Sheldon to help him get his head above water. Meanwhile, Penny considers crashing the guys' annual Comic-Con getaway.

TV-PG

Thursday, Dec 10
12:00 AM

Escape Hatch Identification, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

Leonard and Penny offer Sheldon's old room to Raj after he moves out of his apartment.

TV-PG

12:30 AM

Collaboration Fluctuation, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

Raj moves in with Leonard and Penny and a period of adjustment begins for the three, while usually self-centered Sheldon shows surprising interest in Amy's work.

TV-PG

1:00 AM

Recollection Dissipation, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

Sheldon is working overtime and pushing himself to the limit when he collaborates on projects with Leonard and Howard, and another one with Amy, all on the same day. Bernadette's maternity leave is running out and she must face going back to work.

TV-PG

3:00 AM

Secret Code, The (DVS)

Seinfeld

George conceals his ATM code from fiancee Susan.

TV-PG

4:00 AM

Right Thing, The (DVS)

New Girl

Jess crashes a funeral, hoping to delete a sext she recently sent to the deceased. Then, Schmidt's mom, Louise, arrives in town for a visit to demand he write thank-you notes for his bar mitzvah gifts, and Winston is desperate to be off-duty friends with his police partner, Aly.

TV-14

4:30 AM

Par 5 (DVS)

New Girl

Jess accompanies Fawn to a charity golf tournament, where the vice principal's attempts to make a good impression prove subpar. Meanwhile, Winston meets an attractive woman but needs to lie about being a cop.

TV-14

5:00 AM

Panty Gate (DVS)

New Girl

Fawn is at the center of a political scandal, so Schmidt steps in to help her out. Meanwhile, Jess takes on the role of "love doctor," and Coach faces a life-altering situation with May.

TV-14

5:30 AM

Clean Break (DVS)

New Girl

In the Season 4 finale, Coach is moving out of the loft, while Schmidt gets rid of non-essentials and comes to realize what is really important to him, and Jess & Nick reminisce and try to determine how they feel about each other.

TV-14

6:00 AM

And the Silent Partner (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

Sophie is depressed after being swindled by the contractor in charge of building her dream house, so Max offers to make her a silent partner in the cupcake business but Caroline and Sophie have very different visions for the company.

TV-14

6:30 AM

And the High Holidays (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

Desperate for a way to pay their overdue rent, Max and Caroline get involved with a group of sketchy customers willing to pay top dollar for their cupcakes.

TV-14

7:00 AM

And the Bear Truth (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

A relaxing getaway for two becomes an awkward vacation for three when Max, Caroline, and Andy spend a weekend together in a cabin in the woods.

TV-14

7:30 AM

And Too Little Sleep (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

Max and Caroline enlist the gang from the diner to help them bake throughout the night in order to fulfill a giant cupcake order.

TV-14

1:00 PM

One with the Red Sweater, The (DVS)

Friends

Rachel debates whether she should break the news to her baby's father.

TV-PG

1:30 PM

One Where Rachel Tells..., The (DVS)

Friends

The real father of Rachel's baby is revealed; Monica and Chandler struggle to make their honeymoon flight.

TV-14

2:00 PM

One with the Videotape, The (DVS)

Friends

Ross reveals that he videotaped a sexual encounter between Rachel and him.

TV-PG

2:30 PM

One with Rachel's Date, The (DVS)

Friends

Ross is horrified when Rachel goes on a date with a soap-opera star. Phoebe is attracted to a clumsy chef whom Monica wants to fire.

TV-PG

3:00 PM

One with the Halloween Party, The (DVS)

Friends

At Monica's Halloween party, Phoebe meets her twin sister's fiance and finds that she is attracted to him.

TV-PG

3:30 PM

One with the Stain, The (DVS)

Friends

Rachel wants to find her own apartment. Phoebe is ecstatic when Eric dumps Ursula to date her.

TV-PG

4:00 PM

One with the Stripper, The (DVS)

Friends

Rachel tells her belligerent father that she is pregnant with Ross' child.

TV-PG

4:30 PM

One with the Rumor, The (DVS)

Friends

Monica encounters a high-school friend and invites him to Thanksgiving Day dinner.

TV-PG

5:00 PM

One with Monica's Boots, The (DVS)

Friends

Chandler is angry when Monica buys expensive boots. Phoebe tries to get tickets to a Sting concert.

TV-PG

5:30 PM

One with the Ross' Step Forward, The (DVS)

Friends

Ross' new girlfriend orders Christmas cards with a photo of them on the cover.

TV-PG

6:00 PM

One Where Joey Dates Rachel, The (DVS)

Friends

Rachel joins Joey for a night out in order to prepare him for a big date.

TV-PG

6:30 PM

One Where Chandler Takes a Bath, The (DVS)

Friends

Monica blabs her suspicions when she mistakenly believes Joey is infatuated with Phoebe.

TV-PG

7:00 PM

Phantom of the Telethon (DVS)

American Dad

Congress has cut the CIA torture budget in favor of using that money to help inner city kids learn how to read. The CIA must figure out a new way to raise $1 million to fund their torture program. Stan wants to prove he's an idea man so he struggles to figure out a way to raise the money. Roger mentions to Stan that a telethon would be a great idea. At first Stan dismisses it; but the next day Stan bounds into the house and announces to his family his boss loved his idea of a CIA telethon.

TV-14

7:30 PM

Chimdale (DVS)

American Dad

While Steve is showering after gym class, it is pointed out to him that he has scoliosis! Stan takes him to the doctor, who confirms the ugly truth, and gives him a huge back brace to wear to correct the curvature. Steve is absolutely mortified, and refuses to go to school. Stan persuades him into going by pointing out it's not the outside that matters, but the inside.

TV-14

8:00 PM

Stan Time (DVS)

American Dad

Every night Stan comes home from work exhausted and is faced with the task of spending time with his family and then going straight to bed, eliminating the chance of any alone time. In ten years, he still hasn't been able to get through one chapter of a book. A co-worker slips him some pills that allow him to stay up all night and still feel rested. He jumps at the opportunity, and uses his extra time to do all of the things he hasn't had time to do. He finishes his book, teaches himself the piano and shoots hoops. He feels great. When Francine uncovers his late-night activities and what he's taking in order to make it happen, she demands her own pills.

TV-14

8:30 PM

Family Affair (DVS)

American Dad

When the Smiths get ready for family game night, Roger tells them he can't join them because he has to rehearse for his play that is set to open the next night. They're disappointed but decide to support Roger by going to his play on opening night even though he's begged them not to.

TV-14

9:00 PM

You May Now Kiss the...Uh...Guy Who Receives (DVS)

Family Guy

Brian becomes a crazed activist when Mayor West bans gay marriage after Jasper announces he wants to marry his partner at the Griffin home.

TV-14

9:30 PM

Petergeist (DVS)

Family Guy

Peter discovers an Indian burial ground in the backyard; Stewie gets sucked into the television.

TV-14

10:00 PM

Separation Agitation, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

Leaving baby Halley in day care proves to be tough for Bernadette after she starts back to work; and geologist Bert digs up a girlfriend, but some of his colleagues think she's a golddigger.

TV-PG

10:30 PM

Cognition Regeneration, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

Penny's job offer from a former boyfriend doesn't sit well with Leonard.

TV-PG

11:00 PM

Gyroscopic Collapse, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

Leonard, Sheldon and Wolowitz celebrate the successful completion of their top-secret military project, until an unpleasant surprise leaves their heads spinning. Amy considers an offer of a summer position as a visiting researcher.

TV-PG

11:30 PM

Long Distance Dissonance, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

On the Season 10 finale, Sheldon's former admirer, Dr. Ramona Nowitzki, turns up while Amy is visiting Princeton, and the gang is extremely concerned.

TV-PG

Friday, Dec 11
12:00 AM

Proposal Proposal, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

Season 11 begins with Amy giving Sheldon an answer to his marriage proposal. Meanwhile, Howard and Bernadette struggle with some unexpected news.

TV-PG

12:30 AM

Retraction Reaction, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

Leonard angers the university and the entire physics community when he gives an embarrassing radio interview. Meanwhile, Amy and Bernadette bond over having to hide their success from Sheldon and Howard.

TV-PG

1:00 AM

Relaxation Integration, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

Amy records Sheldon talking in his sleep and tries to convince him that he has a more laid-back side. Meanwhile, Raj and Stuart compete to win the heart of Bernadette's new co-worker.

TV-PG

1:30 AM

Explosion Implosion, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

Wolowitz and Sheldon bond over their relationships with their disappointing fathers when they drive to the desert to shoot off a model rocket. Leonard's mom finds a new best friend in Penny, much to Leonard's dismay.

TV-PG

2:30 AM

No Girl (DVS)

New Girl

While Jess is sequestered at jury duty, Nick rents out the loft to earn money to help pay for Schmidt's bachelor party. Meanwhile, Winston suspects KC is being unfaithful and asks Cece for help learning the truth.

TV-14

3:00 AM

Sponge, The (DVS)

Seinfeld

Elaine considers intimacy with her new boyfriend.

TV-PG

4:00 AM

Big Mama P (DVS)

New Girl

Cece and Schmidt ask Jess and Nick to be maid of honor and best man at their wedding, so the two bridal-party members start to arrange an engagement party. But things take an unusual turn after Jess invites Cece's mom.

TV-14

4:30 AM

What About Fred? (DVS)

New Girl

Jess is ready to date again, but is disappointed in the dud spud she lands, and things get complicated when she takes a serious liking to his perfectly fun parents.

TV-14

5:00 AM

Jury Duty (DVS)

New Girl

Jess in unable to sustain her excitement about jury duty after finding out she may be in line for a promotion at work. Meanwhile, Nick hits the ceiling over the mess Cece's made of the loft.

TV-14

5:30 AM

No Girl (DVS)

New Girl

While Jess is sequestered at jury duty, Nick rents out the loft to earn money to help pay for Schmidt's bachelor party. Meanwhile, Winston suspects KC is being unfaithful and asks Cece for help learning the truth.

TV-14

6:00 AM

And the Psychic Shakedown (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

After discovering that Candy Andy closed up his shop following their breakup, Caroline visits a psychic for a reading about her future love life.

TV-14

6:30 AM

And Just Plane Magic (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

When Max scores tickets to a music awards show in Los Angeles, she and Caroline end up flying on a private jet with Grammy-nominated rapper 2 Chainz.

TV-14

7:00 AM

And the Broken Hip (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

Max and Caroline pay a high price for attempting to remove a street performer away from the entry to their cupcake shop.

TV-14

7:30 AM

And Not-So-Sweet Charity (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

In danger of losing their cupcake shop, Max and Caroline approach Caroline's rich but callous Aunt Charity for help.

TV-14

1:00 PM

One with the Secret Closet, The (DVS)

Friends

Joey realizes his intense feelings for Rachel are excluding Ross from the joys of impending fatherhood.

TV-PG

1:30 PM

One with the Birthing Video, The (DVS)

Friends

Monica prepares a memorable St. Valentine's Day for Chandler with sexy lingerie and X-rated entertainment.

TV-PG

2:00 PM

One Where Joey Tells Rachel, The (DVS)

Friends

Joey tells Rachel that he is in love with her.

TV-PG

2:30 PM

One with the Tea Leaves, The (DVS)

Friends

Rachel devises a lie about her unborn child that she hopes will break the silence between her and Joey. Phoebe reads tea leaves and predicts she will soon encounter the man of her dreams.

TV-PG

3:00 PM

One in Massapequa, The (DVS)

Friends

Phoebe brings her annoyingly upbeat boyfriend to the 35th anniversary of Monica and Ross' parents, who urge Ross and pregnant Rachel to pretend to be married.

TV-PG

3:30 PM

One with Joey's Interview, The (DVS)

Friends

When Soap Opera Digest requests an interview, Joey enlists his friends to make sure he does not say anything that could cost him his role.

TV-PG

4:00 PM

One with the Baby Shower, The (DVS)

Friends

During her baby shower, Rachel realizes she is unprepared to be a mother and accepts her mother's offer to move in to help with the child.

TV-PG

4:30 PM

One with the Cooking Class, The (DVS)

Friends

A food critic blasts Monica's cooking in a newspaper review; a cute saleswoman riles Rachel when she flirts with Ross; Phoebe coaches Chandler for a job interview.

TV-PG

5:00 PM

One Where Rachel Is Late, The (DVS)

Friends

Overdue Rachel tries everything to rush the delivery of her baby.

TV-PG

5:30 PM

One Where Rachel Has a Baby Part 1, The (DVS)

Friends

The friends cause havoc in the maternity ward as Rachel begins childbirth.

TV-PG

6:00 PM

One Where Rachel Has a Baby Part 2, The (DVS)

Friends

The friends cause havoc in the maternity ward as Rachel begins childbirth.

TV-PG

6:30 PM

One Where No One Proposes, The (DVS)

Friends

Joey finds himself engaged to Rachel soon after she delivers her baby girl, while Phoebe assumes Ross is the one who proposed.

TV-PG

7:00 PM

Live and Let Fry (DVS)

American Dad

Stan turns to smuggling when trans fat is banned from Langley Falls. But when Inspector Turlington of the Langley Falls police becomes suspicious of Stan, Stan recruits Steve into his illegal enterprise. Now Steve must find a way to keep the trans fat flowing while under Turlington's watch. Meanwhile, Roger helps Klaus claim an inheritance.

TV-14

7:30 PM

Roy Rodgers McFreely (DVS)

American Dad

After term limits force Stan out of his position as president of the HOA, Roger steps in as the new leader under the guise of one Roy Rogers McFreely. Roger uses his power to pass new resolutions and by-laws solely to anger Stan, who earlier refused to buy Roger grenadine. Stan teams up with Hayley and plots to have Roger removed from office.

TV-14

8:30 PM

Jack's Back (DVS)

American Dad

When Stan's con-man dad Jack resurfaces in prison awaiting trial for a crime he did not commit, Steve gets Stan to let Jack stay with them under house arrest. Steve takes the opportunity to reconcile the two, but Stan is convinced that Jack is just using them to escape prison. Meanwhile, Hayley interns at Roger's attic bar.

TV-14

9:00 PM

Untitled Griffin Family History (DVS)

Family Guy

The Griffins get robbed; Peter narrates a chain of events in world history that explains the Griffin name.

TV-14

9:30 PM

Mother Tucker (DVS)

Family Guy

Peter's mom announces that she is getting a divorce; Peter finds a father figure in anchorman Tom Tucker; Brian gets his own radio show.

TV-14

10:00 PM

Wedding Ringer, The (DVS)

A shy groom in need of a best man turns to a gregarious guy who offers groomsmen services.

TV-14

10:30 PM

Caddy, The (DVS)

Seinfeld

Kramer befriends a caddy who helps him improve his golf game.

TV-PG

Saturday, Dec 12
12:00 PM

Seven, The (DVS)

Seinfeld

Jerry's girlfriend wears the same dress. Elaine loses a bike to Kramer.

TV-PG

12:30 PM

Cadillac Part 1, The (DVS)

Seinfeld

Jerry surprises his parents with a new Cadillac.

TV-PG

1:00 PM

Cadillac Part 2, The (DVS)

Seinfeld

Jerry surprises his parents with a new Cadillac.

TV-PG

1:30 PM

Wedding Ringer, The (DVS)

A shy groom in need of a best man turns to a gregarious guy who offers groomsmen services.

TV-14

2:00 PM

Doll, The (DVS)

Seinfeld

One of Susan's dolls looks like George's mother. Kramer turns pool shark.

TV-PG

4:00 PM

It's Gonna Be a Bloodbath (DVS)

Misery Index, The

Sweat bees in the eyes, one girl's battle with the zombie apocalypse and why you should never inject your privates with petroleum jelly! It's all happening on this hilarious episode of The Misery Index.

TV-14

4:30 PM

Wedding Ringer, The (DVS)

A shy groom in need of a best man turns to a gregarious guy who offers groomsmen services.

TV-14

7:30 PM

Wonder (DVS)

Born with facial differences that, up until now, have prevented him from going to a mainstream school, Auggie Pullman becomes the most unlikely of heroes when he enters the local fifth grade. As his family, his new classmates, and the larger community all struggle to discover their compassion and acceptance, Auggie's extraordinary journey will unite them all and prove you can't blend in when you were born to stand out. Based on the novel by R.J. Palacio.

TV-PG

10:00 PM

Collaboration Contamination, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

Sheldon and Raj confide in Bernadette when they can't handle Amy and Howard working together. Penny and Leonard learn new tactics on how to deal with Sheldon and they come from an unlikely source.

TV-PG

10:30 PM

Wonder (DVS)

Born with facial differences that, up until now, have prevented him from going to a mainstream school, Auggie Pullman becomes the most unlikely of heroes when he enters the local fifth grade. As his family, his new classmates, and the larger community all struggle to discover their compassion and acceptance, Auggie's extraordinary journey will unite them all and prove you can't blend in when you were born to stand out. Based on the novel by R.J. Palacio.

TV-PG

Sunday, Dec 13
1:00 AM

Collaboration Contamination, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

Sheldon and Raj confide in Bernadette when they can't handle Amy and Howard working together. Penny and Leonard learn new tactics on how to deal with Sheldon and they come from an unlikely source.

TV-PG

1:30 AM

Proton Regeneration, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

Sheldon goes head-to-head with Wil Wheaton for the role of the new Professor Proton. Penny steps in and takes care of Halley when Bernadette and Howard both wind up on bed rest.

TV-PG

3:00 AM

It's Gonna Be a Bloodbath (DVS)

Misery Index, The

Sweat bees in the eyes, one girl's battle with the zombie apocalypse and why you should never inject your privates with petroleum jelly! It's all happening on this hilarious episode of The Misery Index.

TV-14

3:30 AM

And the Temporary Distraction (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

When the girls take office temp jobs, Caroline tries to climb the corporate ladder and Max finds herself being hit on by the boss.

TV-14

4:00 AM

And the Big Hole (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

After Han fires Caroline for insulting his diner, Max tries to coax Caroline into apologizing.

TV-14

4:30 AM

Impractical Jokers (DVS)

Four longtime friends compete to embarrass each other with a series of hilarious dares. If they refuse, they lose. At the end, the big loser must endure an epic punishment.

TV-14

5:30 AM

Double the Misery (DVS)

Misery Index, The

Find out what happens when a carnival ride goes wrong, what it means to get intimate with the Golden Gate Bridge, and why what happens in Vegas really should stay there in this special Twins-centric episode of The Misery Index.

TV-14

6:00 AM

It's Gonna Be a Bloodbath (DVS)

Misery Index, The

Sweat bees in the eyes, one girl's battle with the zombie apocalypse and why you should never inject your privates with petroleum jelly! It's all happening on this hilarious episode of The Misery Index.

TV-14

6:30 AM

And the Temporary Distraction (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

When the girls take office temp jobs, Caroline tries to climb the corporate ladder and Max finds herself being hit on by the boss.

TV-14

7:00 AM

And the Big Hole (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

After Han fires Caroline for insulting his diner, Max tries to coax Caroline into apologizing.

TV-14

7:30 AM

And the Worst Selfie Ever (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

Caroline panics when she develops a rash after a night with her ex-boyfriend, Andy.

TV-14

12:00 PM

Friar's Club, The (DVS)

Seinfeld

Jerry tries to join the Friars Club; a new co-worker causes more work for Elaine.

TV-PG

12:30 PM

Wig Master, The (DVS)

Seinfeld

Jerry reconsiders buying a costly jacket by using Elaine's discount at the shop.

TV-PG

1:00 PM

Calzone, The (DVS)

Seinfeld

George becomes his boss's pet when he shares a delicious calzone with him.

TV-PG

1:30 PM

Sherlock Gnomes (DVS)

When Gnomeo and Juliet first arrive in London, their biggest concern is getting their new garden ready for spring. After someone kidnaps their garden gnomes, the duo calls on famous Detective Sherlock Gnomes and his sidekick Watson to solve the case.

TV-PG

2:00 PM

Bottle Deposit Part 2, The (DVS)

Seinfeld

Jerry's mechanic steals his car; Kramer plans to return used bottles to Michigan.

TV-PG

4:00 PM

Double the Misery (DVS)

Misery Index, The

Find out what happens when a carnival ride goes wrong, what it means to get intimate with the Golden Gate Bridge, and why what happens in Vegas really should stay there in this special Twins-centric episode of The Misery Index.

TV-14

4:30 PM

Sherlock Gnomes (DVS)

When Gnomeo and Juliet first arrive in London, their biggest concern is getting their new garden ready for spring. After someone kidnaps their garden gnomes, the duo calls on famous Detective Sherlock Gnomes and his sidekick Watson to solve the case.

TV-PG

5:30 PM

Wonder (DVS)

Born with facial differences that, up until now, have prevented him from going to a mainstream school, Auggie Pullman becomes the most unlikely of heroes when he enters the local fifth grade. As his family, his new classmates, and the larger community all struggle to discover their compassion and acceptance, Auggie's extraordinary journey will unite them all and prove you can't blend in when you were born to stand out. Based on the novel by R.J. Palacio.

TV-PG

8:00 PM

Dr. Seuss' How the Grinch Stole Christmas! (DVS)

Bitter and hateful, the Grinch is irritated at the thought of the nearby village having a happy time celebrating Christmas. So disguised as Santa Claus with his dog Max made to look like a reindeer, he raids the village to steal all the Christmas things.

TV-G

8:30 PM

Wonder (DVS)

Born with facial differences that, up until now, have prevented him from going to a mainstream school, Auggie Pullman becomes the most unlikely of heroes when he enters the local fifth grade. As his family, his new classmates, and the larger community all struggle to discover their compassion and acceptance, Auggie's extraordinary journey will unite them all and prove you can't blend in when you were born to stand out. Based on the novel by R.J. Palacio.

TV-PG

9:00 PM

Shrek 2 (DVS)

After battling a fire-breathing dragon and the evil Lord Farquaad to win the hand of Princess Fiona, Shrek now faces his greatest challenge: the in-laws. Shrek and Princess Fiona return from their honeymoon to find an invitation to visit Fiona's parents, the King and Queen of the Kingdom of Far, Far Away. With Donkey along for the ride, the newlyweds set off. All of the citizens of Far, Far Away turn out to greet their returning Princess, and her parents happily anticipate the homecoming of their daughter and her new Prince. But no one could have prepared them for the sight of their new son-in-law, not to mention how much their little girl had changed. Little did Shrek and Fiona know that their marriage had foiled all of her father's plans for her future--and his own. Now the King must enlist the help of a powerful Fairy Godmother, the handsome Prince Charming and that famed ogre killer Puss In Boots to put right his version of happily ever after.

TV-PG

11:30 PM

Elf's Story: The Elf on the Shelf, An (DVS)

Chippy is assigned to a family that includes a boy who is questioning the magic of Christmas. When Chippy finds the assignment a bit challenging, his good friends, Santa, and an unexpected child help him remember why his job is important!

TV-G

Monday, Dec 14
12:00 AM

Shrek 2 (DVS)

After battling a fire-breathing dragon and the evil Lord Farquaad to win the hand of Princess Fiona, Shrek now faces his greatest challenge: the in-laws. Shrek and Princess Fiona return from their honeymoon to find an invitation to visit Fiona's parents, the King and Queen of the Kingdom of Far, Far Away. With Donkey along for the ride, the newlyweds set off. All of the citizens of Far, Far Away turn out to greet their returning Princess, and her parents happily anticipate the homecoming of their daughter and her new Prince. But no one could have prepared them for the sight of their new son-in-law, not to mention how much their little girl had changed. Little did Shrek and Fiona know that their marriage had foiled all of her father's plans for her future--and his own. Now the King must enlist the help of a powerful Fairy Godmother, the handsome Prince Charming and that famed ogre killer Puss In Boots to put right his version of happily ever after.

TV-PG

1:00 AM

Shrek 2 (DVS)

After battling a fire-breathing dragon and the evil Lord Farquaad to win the hand of Princess Fiona, Shrek now faces his greatest challenge: the in-laws. Shrek and Princess Fiona return from their honeymoon to find an invitation to visit Fiona's parents, the King and Queen of the Kingdom of Far, Far Away. With Donkey along for the ride, the newlyweds set off. All of the citizens of Far, Far Away turn out to greet their returning Princess, and her parents happily anticipate the homecoming of their daughter and her new Prince. But no one could have prepared them for the sight of their new son-in-law, not to mention how much their little girl had changed. Little did Shrek and Fiona know that their marriage had foiled all of her father's plans for her future--and his own. Now the King must enlist the help of a powerful Fairy Godmother, the handsome Prince Charming and that famed ogre killer Puss In Boots to put right his version of happily ever after.

TV-PG

4:00 AM

Shrek 2 (DVS)

After battling a fire-breathing dragon and the evil Lord Farquaad to win the hand of Princess Fiona, Shrek now faces his greatest challenge: the in-laws. Shrek and Princess Fiona return from their honeymoon to find an invitation to visit Fiona's parents, the King and Queen of the Kingdom of Far, Far Away. With Donkey along for the ride, the newlyweds set off. All of the citizens of Far, Far Away turn out to greet their returning Princess, and her parents happily anticipate the homecoming of their daughter and her new Prince. But no one could have prepared them for the sight of their new son-in-law, not to mention how much their little girl had changed. Little did Shrek and Fiona know that their marriage had foiled all of her father's plans for her future--and his own. Now the King must enlist the help of a powerful Fairy Godmother, the handsome Prince Charming and that famed ogre killer Puss In Boots to put right his version of happily ever after.

TV-PG

12:00 PM

One Where Emma Cries, The (DVS)

Friends

Joey seeks forgiveness from Ross, while Rachel tries to quell Emma's incessant crying.

TV-PG

12:30 PM

One with the Pediatrician, The (DVS)

Friends

Emma's pediatrician drops her as a patient because of Rachel's constant calls.

TV-PG

1:00 PM

One with the Sharks, The (DVS)

Friends

Monica fears Chandler has a sexual fetish involving sharks.

TV-14

1:30 PM

One with Phoebe's Birthday Dinner, The (DVS)

Friends

Famished Phoebe waits for tardy friends to arrive at her birthday dinner.

TV-PG

2:00 PM

One with the Male Nanny, The (DVS)

Friends

Ross ridicules Rachel's choice of a male nanny.

TV-PG

2:30 PM

One with Ross's Inappropriate Song, The (DVS)

Friends

Chandler and Joey find a videotape while checking out Richard's apartment; Ross sings Emma an off-color lullaby.

TV-PG

3:00 PM

One with Rachel's Other Sister, The (DVS)

Friends

Rachel has a bone to pick with her self-centered sister on Thanksgiving.

TV-PG

3:30 PM

One with Rachel's Phone Number, The (DVS)

Friends

Rachel impulsively gives her telephone number to a handsome guy but worries he will call when Ross is there.

TV-PG

4:00 PM

Wife Insurance (DVS)

American Dad

Stan reveals to Francine that, in the case she should die, he has a backup wife. Enraged with Stan, Francine takes Jim, one of Stan's CIA buddies, as her backup husband. Jealous, Stan breaks it off with his backup and tells Jim to break it off with Francine. However, Jim confesses that he is in love with Francine and attempts to kill Stan. Now Stan must stop Jim from killing him and taking Francine. Meanwhile Wheels and the Legman (Steve and Roger's detective personae) are on the case trying to find Hayley's lost iPod Shuffle.

TV-14

4:30 PM

DeLorean Story-An (DVS)

American Dad

Frustrated with their lack of common interests, Steve and Stan attempt to bond while on a cross-country trip to find a door for Stan's nearly complete DeLorean. Meanwhile, Roger, Francine and Hayley brainstorm ideas for an adventure to have while Stan and Steve are gone.

TV-14

5:00 PM

Every Which Way But Lose (DVS)

American Dad

Stan volunteers to coach Steve's junior football team and cuts Steve when he sees how terrible Steve is. Furious with his father, Steve enlists Roger to coach a new football team in an attempt to beat Stan's team and make Stan cry. When Steve and Roger succeed, Stan goes home not to cry, but to kill himself. Now Steve must teach Stan how to lose without wanting to kill himself. Meanwhile, Francine and Hayley compete in a pie baking contest.

TV-14

5:30 PM

Weiner of Our Discontent (DVS)

American Dad

For over seventy years, Roger has been acting like he's the most important person on the planet, and Stan is sick of it! Stan considers Roger to be a worthless, lazy, lying, cheating, alcoholic slob. Roger is so hurt by his words he tells Stan the truth. He is the Decider, sent to earth to decide mankind's fate. Now, after Stan's rant, Roger has decided they should be blown to bits. He's going to Roswell to tell the others to push the button.

TV-14

6:00 PM

Can't Buy Me Math (DVS)

Bob's Burgers

Tina teams up with Darryl to win the Cupid's Couple contest at the school dance. Meanwhile, Linda plans a full week of ambitious Valentine's Day activities for her and Bob.

TV-PG

6:30 PM

Millie-Churian Candidate, The (DVS)

Bob's Burgers

Tina and Louise volunteer to run Jimmy Junior's class president campaign in order to keep Millie from winning, and ruining the school. Meanwhile, Bob becomes obsessed with a knife after talking himself into buying it for $300.

TV-PG

7:00 PM

Gayle Tales, The (DVS)

Bob's Burgers

Linda's sister, Gayle, arrives at the restaurant in tears because her date for the evening cancelled on her and she had tickets to Yarnival, which is like Cirque de Soleil but with cats. Desperate to get out of the house after being grounded, the kids compete to be Aunt Gayle's date via an essay contest.

TV-PG

7:30 PM

Li'l Hard Dad (DVS)

Bob's Burgers

Bob becomes obsessed with his new automatic helicopter. When it falls apart for no reason, he demands a refund and ends up in a dispute with the manufacturer. Gene assists Bob in his quest but things quickly get out of hand and end in a crazy helicopter battle. Meanwhile, Louise and Linda help Tina prepare for her oral book report.

TV-PG

8:00 PM

Adventures in Chinchilla-Sitting (DVS)

Bob's Burgers

Bob and Linda head out on the town for a date but to Linda's dismay, Bob's idea of romance proves trivial. Meanwhile, a wild chinchilla chase ensues after the school pet that Louis was charged with watching escapes out the front door.

TV-PG

8:30 PM

Family Guy Viewer Mail #2 (DVS)

Family Guy

Three skits: the British program that Family Guy is based on, everybody Peter touches turns into Robin Williams, and a look at the day through Stewie's eyes.

TV-14

9:00 PM

Internal Affairs (DVS)

Family Guy

Peter talks Joe into having an affair and gets into another epic fight with the giant chicken.

TV-14

9:30 PM

Friends Without Benefits (DVS)

Family Guy

Meg discovers that a boy she has a crush on is gay - and that has his eye on Chris.

TV-14

10:00 PM

Ratings Guy (DVS)

Family Guy

The Griffins are chosen to be a Neilsen family, and Peter takes advantage of the chance to reformat TV to his taste - except that everyone else hates his changes.

TV-14

10:30 PM

Old Man and the Big C (DVS)

Family Guy

Brian overhears a doctor telling Carter that Carter has only two weeks to live, but when Lois frantically checks on her father he's mysteriously healthy - and Brian wants to know why.

TV-14

11:00 PM

Yug Ylimaf (DVS)

Family Guy

Brian discovers that he can use Stewie's time machine to pick up girls, but when he tries to cover his tracks he accidentally reverses the flow of time.

TV-14

11:30 PM

Joe's Revenge (DVS)

Family Guy

Joe, Peter and Quagmire set out to capture the criminal who caused Joe's paralysis; Brian grows jealous of Quagmire's cat.

TV-14

Tuesday, Dec 15
12:00 AM

Lois Comes Out of Her Shell (DVS)

Family Guy

After celebrating another birthday, Lois adopts a younger look and lifestyle - much to Peter's chagrin; a vengeful turtle targets the Griffins.

TV-14

12:30 AM

Friends Without Benefits (DVS)

Family Guy

Meg discovers that a boy she has a crush on is gay - and that has his eye on Chris.

TV-14

1:00 AM

Ghost Dad (DVS)

American Dad

Stan struggles to cope with the untimely death of his father. Meanwhile, a simple canoeing trip does catastrophic damage to Hayley and Jeff's relationship.

TV-14

1:30 AM

Men ll Boyz (DVS)

American Dad

Klaus enlists Stan, Roger and Jeff to join him on a wild bachelor party weekend.

TV-14

2:00 AM

Conan 101448 (DVS)

Conan

Guest: Jay Pharoah

TV-14

2:30 AM

Wait Out, The (DVS)

Seinfeld

Jerry and Elaine anticipate dating soon-to-be-single friends.

TV-PG

3:00 AM

Invitations, The (DVS)

Seinfeld

George searches for a way to stop his impending nuptials.

TV-PG

3:30 AM

Conan 101448 (DVS)

Conan

Guest: Jay Pharoah

TV-14

4:00 AM

Pontiac Bandit (DVS)

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

One of Rosa's perps has information on a car thief Jake has been after for years; the station struggles to accommodate Charles' needs; Holt tries to find two puppies a home.

TV-14

4:30 AM

Ebony Falcon, The (DVS)

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Terry takes cues from Jake while on his first task back in the field; Amy and Rosa help solve a case at Gina's apartment.

TV-14

5:00 AM

Party, The (DVS)

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

The officers go to Holt's house to celebrate his birthday but end up making a poor impression on his husband.

TV-14

5:30 AM

Operation: Broken Feather (DVS)

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

While investigating a string of hotel robberies, Jake learns Amy may go work with the major crimes unit; Holt and Jeffords endeavor to make the precinct more efficient.

TV-14

6:00 AM

And the Extra Work (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

Max and Caroline are invited to be extras on a popular TV show shooting a scene in Han's diner, but when Caroline catches the director's eye, he offers her an actual role with strings attached.

TV-14

6:30 AM

And the Tip Slip (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

Caroline's father, Martin Channing, asks Caroline to go on a talk show to defend him when a former employee threatens to defame him in a tell-all book.

TV-14

7:00 AM

And the Window of Opportunity (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

When Max and Caroline offer to deep-clean a previously hidden part of the diner, they discover something that could re-launch their cupcake business.

TV-14

7:30 AM

And the Soft Opening (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

Business is booming at Max & Caroline's new cupcake walk-up after word spreads about a shocking incident involving a rock star.

TV-14

1:00 PM

One with Christmas in Tulsa, The (DVS)

Friends

Monica fears the worst when she learns Chandler will be spending Christmas in Tulsa working on a deadline with a beautiful co-worker.

TV-PG

1:30 PM

One Where Rachel Goes Back to Work, The (DVS)

Friends

Rachel crosses swords with her temporary replacement at the shop; Phoebe wreaks havoc on the set of Joey's soap opera.

TV-PG

2:00 PM

One with Phoebe's Rats, The (DVS)

Friends

Monica invites Rachel's workplace rival to her birthday party; Joey flirts with Emma's new nanny; Phoebe and Mike take care of a litter of rats.

TV-PG

2:30 PM

One Where Monica Sings, The (DVS)

Friends

Monica exults in the applause she receives on karaoke night, unaware that the cheering audience can see through her blouse.

TV-PG

3:00 PM

One with the Blind Dates, The (DVS)

Friends

Joey and Phoebe conspire to send Rachel and Ross on disastrous blind dates.

TV-14

3:30 PM

One with the Mugging, The (DVS)

Friends

Joey stumbles upon a way to impress a famous actor during an audition; Ross learns the identity of a long-ago mugger; Chandler accepts an internship at a shoe company.

TV-PG

4:00 PM

One with the Boob Job, The (DVS)

Friends

Both Monica and Chandler secretly approach Joey for a loan; Phoebe invites Mike to move in with her; Rachel baby-proofs the apartment.

TV-PG

4:30 PM

One with the Memorial Service, The (DVS)

Friends

Ross and Chandler trade barbed insults on their alma mater's Web site.

TV-PG

5:00 PM

One with the Lottery, The (DVS)

Friends

The gang buys scads of lottery tickets for the multimillion-dollar jackpot.

TV-PG

5:30 PM

One with Rachel's Dream, The (DVS)

Friends

Rachel's visit to a soap opera set inspires her to dream about Joey; Chandler takes Ross on a weekend getaway after Monica cannot take time off from work.

TV-PG

6:00 PM

One with the Soap Opera Party, The (DVS)

Friends

Ross invites an attractive paleontologist to a rooftop Days of Our Lives party being thrown by Joey.

TV-PG

6:30 PM

One with the Fertility Test, The (DVS)

Friends

Monica and Chandler run into an old acquaintance when they secretly go to a fertility clinic; Ross helps Joey woo the same professor he wants to date.

TV-14

7:00 PM

Daddy Queerest (DVS)

American Dad

Stan is humiliated by the way Francine behaves in social situations so he pushes her in the pool at a party; he can't take it any more. The next morning their neighbors Terry and Greg come over and ask for their help. Terry's father is coming to visit for his jersey-retirement party. He doesn't know Terry is gay and has adopted a baby girl with Greg. Francine convinces Terry to tell his father the truth and promises she will support him through it. Stan is excited because he gets to meet Tank. When Tank arrives, Terry chickens out: He tells his father that Francine is his girlfriend, and they had a baby out of wedlock.

TV-14

7:30 PM

Stan's Night Out (DVS)

American Dad

Stan feels left out when he discovers that a few of the guys from work have been hitting the town while he sits at home with Francine eating dinner on a TV tray and watching gardening shows.

TV-14

8:00 PM

In Country...Club (DVS)

American Dad

When Steve is selected to sing the national anthem at the Langley Falls Veterans' Day celebration, he gets some heat from Stan who doesn't think he's ready for such an undertaking. Unimpressed with Steve's vocal talents, Stan decides Steve needs to experience real war in order to sing about our country's military prowess. But things quickly go south when Roger gets involved and Steve goes bananas.

TV-14

8:30 PM

Moon Over Isla Island (DVS)

American Dad

Stan convinces the dictator of Isla Island to sign a treaty to get a promotion at work. Meanwhile, Steve and Snot get competitive to see who can get farther with the other's mom.

TV-14

9:00 PM

Stewie Loves Lois (DVS)

Family Guy

Lois gets sick of Stewie's newfound affection; Peter has a prostate exam.

TV-14

9:30 PM

Hell Comes to Quahog (DVS)

Family Guy

Brian and Stewie try to save the town when corporate giant Superstore puts all the local shops out of business.

TV-14

10:00 PM

Geology Methodology, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

Sheldon and Bert collaborate on a research project, despite Sheldon's embarrassment. Penny and Bernadette coach Koothrappali on how to navigate his relationship with Ruchi.

TV-PG

10:30 PM

Tesla Recoil, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

Leonard and Howard are furious after they learn Sheldon went to work with the military behind their backs. Bernadette is on bed rest, and she asks Raj to do some digging when she suspects Ruchi is trying to steal her job.

TV-PG

11:00 PM

Bitcoin Entanglement, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

Sheldon tries to teach the guys a lesson after they cut him out of a potentially valuable Bitcoin investment. Also, a seven-year-old video reveals a secret about Leonard and Penny's relationship.

TV-PG

11:30 PM

Confidence Erosion, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

Sheldon and Amy try to eliminate stress from wedding planning by applying math to the process. Raj "breaks up" with Howard after realizing his best friend is actually hurting his confidence.

TV-PG

Wednesday, Dec 16
12:00 AM

Celebration Reverberation, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

Sheldon and Howard plan birthday celebrations for Amy and Halley, respectively. Leonard receives a Christmas letter from his brother that causes him to spiral out about his own lack of accomplishments.

TV-14

12:30 AM

Matrimonial Metric, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

To discover who would be most qualified to be best man and maid of honor at their wedding, Sheldon and Amy subject their friends to a series of secret experiments. Also, Penny reveals her true feelings about Amy.

TV-PG

1:00 AM

Solo Oscillation, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

When Sheldon kicks Amy out to work solo, she and Leonard bond during a series of science experiments. Bert the geologist replaces Howard in the band Footprints on the Moon, and Sheldon finds Penny a surprising source of scientific inspiration.

TV-PG

1:30 AM

I'd Say Sex With a Nun! (DVS)

Misery Index, The

A priest and nun have some late-night fun, a truckload of glass flattens a motorcyclist, and an Englishman with a with very weird horse fetish - and that's just a small taste of this insanely funny episode of The Misery Index.

TV-14

2:00 AM

Conan 101449 (DVS)

Conan

Guest: Diego Luna

TV-14

2:30 AM

I'd Say Sex With a Nun! (DVS)

Misery Index, The

A priest and nun have some late-night fun, a truckload of glass flattens a motorcyclist, and an Englishman with a with very weird horse fetish - and that's just a small taste of this insanely funny episode of The Misery Index.

TV-14

3:00 AM

It's Gonna Be a Bloodbath (DVS)

Misery Index, The

Sweat bees in the eyes, one girl's battle with the zombie apocalypse and why you should never inject your privates with petroleum jelly! It's all happening on this hilarious episode of The Misery Index.

TV-14

3:30 AM

Conan 101449 (DVS)

Conan

Guest: Diego Luna

TV-14

4:00 AM

Full Boyle (DVS)

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Jake intervenes in Detective Boyle's relationship; Rosa and Amy contend with a citizen who is a costumed crime-fighter; Capt. Holt has a new opponent.

TV-14

4:30 AM

Apartment, The (DVS)

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Jake's fate is in Gina's hands as his crushing debt threatens to put him on the streets; Holt and Jeffords hold performance reviews; Rosa and Boyle have a run-in with an other officer.

TV-PG

5:00 AM

Tactical Village (DVS)

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

All the regional precincts compete in a mandatory training course; Amy runs into an officer she used to date; Rosa is mad when Charles doesn't invite her to his wedding.

TV-14

5:30 AM

Fancy Brudgom (DVS)

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

As Charles' best man, Jake must be involved with important wedding decisions including cake tasting and floral arrangements; Gina, Terry and Amy start an extreme diet; Rosa has to make a sincere apology.

TV-14

6:00 AM

And the Kickstarter (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

Caroline tries to raise money for an expensive pair of new pants through an online fundraising site. Meanwhile, Max's new smartphone comes between her and Caroline.

TV-14

6:30 AM

And the Kitty Kitty Spank Spank (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

When Max becomes smitten with an old stray cat that's been hanging around the apartment, Caroline tries to convince her they need to find it a better home. But just when they think they've found one, the cat's fate takes a turn.

TV-14

7:00 AM

And the Group Head (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

When Max and Caroline can't figure out how to use the new cappuccino maker they bought for their cupcake business, they take temporary side jobs as baristas at a coffee house to learn the ropes.

TV-14

7:30 AM

And the Cronuts (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

When Max and Caroline start losing business to the new cronut craze (half-croissant, half-donut), they come up with their own trend: cake fries.

TV-14

1:00 PM

One with the Donor, The (DVS)

Friends

Monica and Chandler interview unsuspecting candidates, hoping to find the right man to father their baby.

TV-PG

1:30 PM

One in Barbados Part 1, The (DVS)

Friends

The gang heads to Barbados for a paleontology convention where Ross is the keynote speaker; David prepares to propose to Phoebe, but ex-boyfriend Mike is not yet out of the picture.

TV-PG

2:00 PM

One in Barbados Part 2, The (DVS)

Friends

The gang heads to Barbados for a paleontology convention where Ross is the keynote speaker; David prepares to propose to Phoebe, but ex-boyfriend Mike is not yet out of the picture.

TV-PG

2:30 PM

One Where Ross Is Fine, The (DVS)

Friends

Ross drinks too much alcohol at dinner with Rachel, Joey and Charlie; Frank Jr. cannot cope with his precocious triplets.

TV-PG

3:00 PM

One with Ross's Tan, The (DVS)

Friends

Rachel and Joey nervously anticipate their first real date; Monica and Phoebe try to avoid an obnoxious friend with a fake British accent; Ross emerges from a tanning booth with a two-toned appearance.

TV-PG

3:30 PM

One with the Cake, The (DVS)

Friends

An X-rated cake is delivered to Emma's first birthday party.

TV-PG

4:00 PM

One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits, The (DVS)

Friends

Rachel convinces her sister to baby-sit over Ross' protests; Joey writes a letter to an adoption agency on Monica and Chandler's behalf.

TV-PG

4:30 PM

One with Ross's Grant, The (DVS)

Friends

When Ross interviews with Charlie's ex-boyfriend for a prized grant, the doctor makes a shocking stipulation; Chandler lies about watching Joey's bizarre audition tape.

TV-PG

5:00 PM

One with the Home Study, The (DVS)

Friends

Monica and Chandler fuss over their apartment as they expect a visit from the adoption worker; Phoebe and Mike opt for a small wedding and donate the extra money to a children's charity.

TV-PG

5:30 PM

One with the Late Thanksgiving, The (DVS)

Friends

Monica prepares a Thanksgiving feast for the gang, then becomes enraged when everyone shows up late; Phoebe convinces Rachel to enter Emma in a baby beauty contest.

TV-PG

6:00 PM

One with the Birth Mother, The (DVS)

Friends

A prospective birth mother labors under a misconception about Monica and Chandler's respective occupations.

TV-PG

6:30 PM

One Where Chandler Gets Caught, The (DVS)

Friends

Rachel and Phoebe spot Chandler getting into a vehicle with a mysterious blond woman.

TV-PG

7:00 PM

Home Adrone (DVS)

American Dad

Steve and his friends find and play with what they think is a video game in his father's study, but they really activate a CIA drone.

TV-14

7:30 PM

Brains, Brains, and Automobiles (DVS)

American Dad

When Hayley and Steve leave for their respective summers of fun, Francine looks forward to her newfound alone time with Stan.

TV-14

8:00 PM

Man in the Moonbounce (DVS)

American Dad

Stan vows to live out all the teenage pranks he missed with Steve and his friends. But when they are caught, he winds up going to prison.

TV-14

8:30 PM

Shallow Vows (DVS)

American Dad

Upset that Francine has let herself go, Stan takes drastic measures when she asks him to renew their wedding vows.

TV-14

9:00 PM

Saving Private Brian (DVS)

Family Guy

Brian and Stewie find themselves in boot camp; Chris and his rock band have a hit with their single ``Evil, Evil Monkey.''

TV-14

9:30 PM

Whistle While Your Wife Works (DVS)

Family Guy

When Peter's boss (Carrie Fisher) tells him he needs to pick up the pace, Lois goes to the brewery to help him.

TV-14

10:00 PM

Separation Triangulation, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

Raj learns the woman he's dating has a very upset husband. Sheldon rents his old room for a quiet place to work.

TV-PG

10:30 PM

Novelization Correlation, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

Sheldon petitions Wil Wheaton to appear on the new "Professor Proton Show", but Wil offers a role to Amy instead. Penny gets angry when she thinks the female protagonist in Leonard's novel is based on her.

TV-PG

11:00 PM

Neonatal Nomenclature, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

When Bernadette won't go in labor, all her friends try different tactics to get things started. Howard confronts Bernadette after Amy accidentally reveals she's already chosen their son's name.

TV-PG

11:30 PM

Athenaeum Allocation, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

Leonard jumps through hoops to help secure the perfect wedding venue for Sheldon and Amy. Bernadette and Howard have a hard time deciding who should stay home with the kids and who should go back to work.

TV-PG

Thursday, Dec 17
12:00 AM

Gates Excitation, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

Penny gets the opportunity to host Bill Gates at work when his company wants to partner with her pharmaceutical company. Leonard, Raj, and Howard do everything in their power to meet him, while Sheldon thinks he is the victim of an April Fools prank.

TV-PG

12:30 AM

Tenant Disassociation, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

When Leonard learns Sheldon is the president of the tenants association, he decides to run against him. Bernadette encourages Howard and Raj to find the owner of a drone after they find it in the backyard.

TV-PG

1:00 AM

Reclusive Potential, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

A brilliant but reclusive scientist, Doctor Wolcott, invites Sheldon to his cabin in the middle of nowhere, and Leonard, Raj and Howard go along for the trip. Penny and Bernadette improvise after Amy doesn't like the tame bachelorette party they planned for her.

TV-PG

1:30 AM

December 16, 2020 (DVS)

Full Frontal with Samantha Bee

A talk show of Samantha Bee's nuanced, satirical view of political and cultural issues.

TV-MA

2:00 AM

Conan 101450 (DVS)

Conan

Guest: Christopher Walken

TV-14

2:30 AM

December 16, 2020 (DVS)

Full Frontal with Samantha Bee

A talk show of Samantha Bee's nuanced, satirical view of political and cultural issues.

TV-MA

3:00 AM

Foundation, The (DVS)

Seinfeld

George is ready to move on, but Susan's parents want to keep her memory alive.

TV-PG

3:30 AM

Conan 101450 (DVS)

Conan

Guest: Christopher Walken

TV-14

4:00 AM

Bob & Carol & Nick & Schmidt (DVS)

New Girl

Nick's cousin and his wife visit with a very special request, which prompts Schmidt to offer Nick a glimpse into the future. Meanwhile, Winston and Cece shop for a wedding dress.

TV-14

4:30 AM

Reagan (DVS)

New Girl

While Jess in on jury duty, the gang sublets her room to a comely pharmaceutical rep who brings quite a charge to their lives.

TV-14

5:00 AM

Wig (DVS)

New Girl

Schmidt and Cece's relationship is impacted by lovestruck Nick's attraction to Reagan, so they try to make her appear somewhat less alluring. Meanwhile, Winston schools Reagan in the art of breaking up.

TV-14

5:30 AM

Decision, The (DVS)

New Girl

Reagan causes chaos when she tells Nick and Winston that she will only sleep with one of them, in an attempt to challenge the guys' indecisiveness. Meanwhile, Schmidt is reunited with his college frenemy, Benjamin.

TV-14

6:00 AM

And the Piece of Sheet (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

Caroline buys Max a new bedding set and gives away the old sheets to charity without realizing they had sentimental value to her.

TV-14

6:30 AM

And the Girlfriend Experience (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

Han asks Max and Caroline to convince a stripper to pretend to be his girlfriend when his mother visits from Korea.

TV-14

7:00 AM

And the "It" Hole (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

Caroline's date is a no-show after promising to take her to one of the city's hippest new restaurants, so she and Max decide to take advantage of the hard-to-get reservation.

TV-14

7:30 AM

And the Pastry Porn (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

Max applies to the Manhattan School of Pastry and bakes a tart for the entrance exam.

TV-14

1:00 PM

One Where the Stripper Cries, The (DVS)

Friends

Joey appears as a celebrity contestant on $100,000 Pyramid. Monica and Rachel hire an ungainly stripper for Phoebe's bachelorette party.

TV-14

1:30 PM

Last One Part 2, The (DVS)

Friends

The six friends say goodbye and embark on the next chapters of their lives.

TV-PG

2:00 PM

One Where Joey Speaks French, The (DVS)

Friends

Monica and Chandler show Erica the sights but also learn their baby's biological father might be an unsavory character. Joey begs Phoebe to teach him how to speak French before an audition.

TV-PG

2:30 PM

One with Princess Consuela, The (DVS)

Friends

Rachel goes to a job interview at a restaurant and winds up sitting next to her current boss. Joey feels abandoned because Monica and Chandler are leaving.

TV-PG

3:00 PM

One Where Estelle Dies, The (DVS)

Friends

Ross tries to win back Rachel's job with her former fashion employer. Phoebe tries to keep Joey from learning about his agent's death; Monica and Chandler make a horrifying discovery.

TV-PG

3:30 PM

One with Rachel's Going Away Party (DVS)

Friends

One of the guys becomes offended when Rachel does not give him the same goodbye she gives the others.

TV-PG

4:00 PM

Last One Part 1, The (DVS)

Friends

The six friends say goodbye and embark on the next chapters of their lives.

TV-PG

4:30 PM

Last One Part 2, The (DVS)

Friends

The six friends say goodbye and embark on the next chapters of their lives.

TV-PG

5:00 PM

One Where Monica Gets a Roommate, The (DVS)

Friends

Six friends in their twenties pursue careers, love and happiness in New York City while relying on each other for support.

TV-PG

5:30 PM

One with the Sonogram, The (DVS)

Friends

Ross is stunned to learn his ex-wife is pregnant with their child. Monica's dinner for her overly critical parents is a disaster.

TV-PG

6:00 PM

One with the Thumb, The (DVS)

Friends

The group loves Monica's new boyfriend; Chandler resumes smoking; and Phoebe receives a large sum of money unexpectedly.

TV-PG

6:30 PM

One with George Stephanopoulos, The (DVS)

Friends

While the men attend a hockey game and end up at a hospital, the women spy on President Clinton's top aide, George Stephanopoulos, who lives across the street. Rachel receives her first paycheck.

TV-PG

7:00 PM

My Morning Straitjacket (DVS)

American Dad

After attending a concert with Hayley, Stan becomes obsessed with her music.

TV-14

7:30 PM

G-String Circus (DVS)

American Dad

When Hayley rejects Stan's advice, he decides to start a dry-cleaning business run by a bunch of strippers. But when the business fails miserably, he is forced to become a male stripper to make some extra money.

TV-14

8:00 PM

Rapture's Delight (DVS)

American Dad

The Rapture happens on Christmas Eve, and Stan is left behind.

TV-14

8:30 PM

Don't Look a Smith Horse in the Mouth (DVS)

American Dad

When Francine demands that Stan get rid of his gas-guzzling SUV because it's draining the family of money, he hatches a plan with Roger at the local horse track to avoid giving up his ride. Meanwhile, it's up to Steve and his friends to help out an old friend.

TV-14

9:00 PM

Prick Up Your Ears (DVS)

Family Guy

Lois volunteers to teach a sex-ed class at the high school when she learns that Chris has some incorrect information on the subject.

TV-14

9:30 PM

Chick Cancer (DVS)

Family Guy

Stewie marries his old friend Olivia; Lois introduces Peter to chick flicks.

TV-14

10:00 PM

Comet Polarization, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

Sheldon's comic book store experience changes when writer Neil Gaiman puts Stuart's store on the map. Raj takes credit for Penny's astronomical discovery, and friendships are threatened.

TV-PG

10:30 PM

Monetary Insufficiency, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

Sheldon goes to Vegas to win money for science. Penny and Bernadette take Amy wedding dress shopping, but her terrible choice entangles them in a web of lies.

TV-PG

11:00 PM

Sibling Realignment, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

When Sheldon learns that his mother won't attend his wedding unless he invites his brother, George, he and Leonard travel to Texas to end a family feud. The Wolowitz kids inadvertently infest Amy, Bernadette, Howard and Raj with pinkeye.

TV-PG

11:30 PM

Bow Tie Asymmetry, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

The Season 11 finale: When Amy's parents and Sheldon's family arrive for the wedding, everybody is focused on making sure all goes according to plan--everyone except the bride and groom.

TV-PG

Friday, Dec 18
12:00 AM

Conjugal Configuration, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

In the Season 12 premiere, Sheldon and Amy's honeymoon runs aground in New York, while Penny and Leonard discover they are uncomfortably similar to Amy's parents, Mr. and Mrs. Fowler. Raj insults physicist Neil deGrasse Tyson and starts a twitter war.

TV-14

12:30 AM

Wedding Gift Wormhole, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

Sheldon and Amy drive themselves crazy trying to figure out what "perfect gift" Leonard and Penny gave them for their wedding. Raj decides he wants to settle down and asks his father to arrange a marriage for him.

TV-PG

1:00 AM

Procreation Calculation, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

Howard's life gets complicated when Stuart starts bringing his new girlfriend home. Penny and Leonard talk about starting a family while Raj explores an arranged marriage.

TV-PG

1:30 AM

Tam Turbulence, The (DVS)

Big Bang Theory, The

Sheldon won't tell anyone why he's never mentioned Tam, his childhood best friend, so Leonard takes matters into his own hands. Bernadette and Penny take out Raj's fiance, Anu, for dinner to get the skinny on her.

TV-PG

2:00 AM

Conan 101451 (DVS)

Conan

Guest: Sienna Miller

TV-14

2:30 AM

Soul Mate, The (DVS)

Seinfeld

George suspects the foundation attorney believes he murdered Susan.

TV-PG

3:00 AM

Bizzaro Jerry, The (DVS)

Seinfeld

Elaine's soon-to-be former beau has two friends who resemble George and Kramer.

TV-PG

3:30 AM

Conan 101451 (DVS)

Conan

Guest: Sienna Miller

TV-14

4:00 AM

Heat Wave (DVS)

New Girl

Things heat up between Nick and Reagan over who can provide the loft with the best air conditioning unit. Meanwhile, Winston uses his cop voice to help Schmidt prep Cece for a newscaster audition.

TV-14

4:30 AM

Goosebumps Walkaway (DVS)

New Girl

Jess returns from jury duty and tries to uncover the real identity of a juror sequestered with her. Meanwhile, Reagan prepares to move out of the loft and out of Nick's life; and Winston and Cece help Schmidt get over his fear of public dancing.

TV-14

5:00 AM

Apartment, The (DVS)

New Girl

Cece moves into the loft; Jess must finish the school's budget by morning; Winston gets a new partner to avoid having to work side-by-side with Aly.

TV-14

5:30 AM

D-Day (DVS)

New Girl

Jess agrees to lend Schmidt a hand when he takes over wedding planning after Cece gets an exciting job offer, but things take a bad turn when Schmidt's dad shows up. Meanwhile, Winston and Nick compete to determine who has the harder job.

TV-14

6:00 AM

And the First Day of School (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

Max attempts to make a good impression on her first day of pastry school, but finds the class clown to be extremely distracting and intriguing.

TV-14

6:30 AM

And the Life After Death (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

Caroline learns that her childhood nanny passed away and brings Max with her to attend the funeral. But once there she discovers that the woman never spoke of Caroline to her own family.

TV-PG

7:00 AM

And the French Kiss (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

After a great make-out session with Max's teacher, Caroline learns a secret about him that she wishes she'd known beforehand.

TV-14

7:30 AM

And the Big But (DVS)

2 Broke Girls

Max wants to be more than friends with her pastry school partner; Caroline remains attracted to her married teacher.

TV-14

1:00 PM

One with the East German Laundry Detergent, The (DVS)

Friends

While Phoebe and Chandler end their respective romantic relationships, Rachel and Ross do laundry together on their first date.

TV-PG

1:30 PM

One with the Butt, The (DVS)

Friends

Joey gets a film role as a stand-in for Al Pacino's butt. Ross tries to be less conservative. Chandler has an affair with a married woman.

TV-14

2:00 PM

One with the Blackout, The (DVS)

Friends

A citywide power outage leaves Chandler stranded in the vestibule for an automatic banking machine with gorgeous model Jill Connick. Ross tries to ask Rachel out on a date. Joey learns Monica used to be infatuated with him.

TV-PG

2:30 PM

One Where the Nana Dies Twice, The (DVS)

Friends

When Ross and Monica's grandmother dies, the whole gang attends the funeral service. Chandler questions his sexual persona when a co-worker wants to arrange a date for him with another guy.

TV-14

3:00 PM

One Where Underdog Gets Away, The (DVS)

Friends

Monica intends to host a cozy Thanksgiving feast in her apartment with her friends but her plans go awry, and the feast becomes a fiasco.

TV-PG

3:30 PM

One with the Monkey, The (DVS)

Friends

The friends promise to celebrate New Year's Eve without dates but soon all their plans change. Ross gets a pet monkey.

TV-PG

4:00 PM

One with Mrs. Bing, The (DVS)

Friends

Chandler's flamboyant mother comes to New York for a visit. Phoebe and Monica cause a traffic accident.

TV-PG

4:30 PM

One with the Dozen Lasagnas, The (DVS)

Friends

Rachel's Italian boyfriend tries to seduce Phoebe. Rachel accidentally reveals a secret to Ross. Monica's aunt refuses to take the lasagnas she ordered from Monica.

TV-PG

5:00 PM

One with the Boobies, The (DVS)

Friends

Chandler sees Rachel nude. Joey learns his father is having an affair.

TV-PG

5:30 PM

One with the Stoned Guy, The (DVS)

Friends

A restaurant owner interviews Monica for a chef's position. Ross asks Joey how to talk dirty to women.

TV-14

6:00 PM

One with Two Parts Part 1, The (DVS)

Friends

Phoebe's twin sister causes confusion and conflict. Ross attends childbirth classes with his ex-wife and her girlfriend.

TV-PG

6:30 PM

One with Two Parts Part 2, The (DVS)

Friends

Rachel and Monica squabble over two handsome doctors. Ross ponders his impending fatherhood with his own father.

TV-PG

7:00 PM

Jones for a Smith, A (DVS)

American Dad

Stan puts down liberal social programs because he thinks they're a waste of money and gives Francine a hard time for lending a helping hand at the local homeless shelter. When Stan develops a nasty addiction and needs help, he suddenly has a change of heart.

TV-14

7:30 PM

May the Best Stan Win (DVS)

American Dad

As Valentine's Day approaches, a cyborg version of Stan attempts to steal Francine away from Stan; Roger directs a shot-for-shot remake of the movie "The Goonies."

TV-14

8:00 PM

Central Intelligence (DVS)

After reconnecting with an old friend via Facebook, an accountant is thrown into the world of international espionage.

TV-14

8:30 PM

Merlot Down Dirty Shame (DVS)

American Dad

Complications ensue when Roger accompanies Francine to wine country; Klaus and Hayley trick Steve into believing he's dreaming when he's really awake.

TV-14

9:00 PM

Road to Rupert (DVS)

Family Guy

Brian accidentally sells Stewie's beloved teddy bear, Rupert; Meg must drive Peter around after he loses his license.

TV-14

9:30 PM

Peter's Two Dads (DVS)

Family Guy

After Peter's dad dies, he finds out that his real father lives in Ireland; Stewie realizes that he likes when Lois spanks him, so he purposely gets into trouble.

TV-14

10:00 PM

Little Kicks, The (DVS)

Seinfeld

Kramer's friend forces Jerry to perform an illegal activity.

TV-PG

10:30 PM

Package, The (DVS)

Seinfeld

Kramer tries to scam the U.S. Postal Service to get a refund for Jerry's stereo.

TV-PG