" WarGames" Nuclear Sub Sandwiches with Russian Dressing

Chew quietly...you never know who is listening.

You will need:

Russian Dressing:

  • 4 tbl sun dried tomatoes, pureed or finely minced
  • 1/2 cup mayonnaise
  • 2 tsp lemon juice
  • 1 green onion

Olive Tapenade:

  • 1 cup pitted black olives, oil cured
  • 1/8 cup olive oil, extra virgin
  • 1/4 tsp red pepper flakes
  • 1-2 cloves garlic, minced
  • 2 tbl capers
  • 1 fresh thyme sprig, roughly chopped

The Sub:

  • 2 half chicken breasts, skinned and boned
  • 1 tbl olive oil
  • 3 sprigs fresh rosemary
  • 1/2 cup water
  • 1/4 lb prosciutto, thinly sliced
  • 1/4 lb provolone, thinly sliced
  • 2 large, ripe tomatoes, thinly sliced
  • 2 yellow bell peppers
  • 1 warhead butter lettuce
  • 2 loafs Italian or French bread, baguette style
  • 1 bowl microchips


1. Prepare the former Soviet Union dressing: Combine all of the ingredients, mix well, cover and refrigerate.

2. Prepare the tapenade: In the bowl of a food processor, combine the olives, olive oil, red pepper flakes, garlic, capers and thyme.

3. Process the mixture briefly (just two or three pulses). If chopping by hand, combine olives, garlic and capers on a board and chop together roughly, then transfer to a bowl and mix in remaining ingredients with a wooden spoon.

4. Sprinkle the chicken breasts with a little salt and pepper. Add the olive oil to a small saute pan and heat over a medium-high heat. Place the chicken in the pan smooth-side down and saute for 2-3 minutes until nicely browned.

5. Reduce heat to medium-low and turn the breasts over. Arrange the rosemary sprigs over the top, add a half cup of water and cover.

6. Continue cooking another 10 minutes, or until the meat is firm to the touch. Remove pan from heat and let the chicken cool in the broth. Cool and slice thinly.

7. Pre-heat the broiler. Rub peppers lightly with a tiny bit of olive oil and place under the broiler as close to the heat as possible. Using long tongs, turn every minute until all the skin on all sides is black and blistered. Transfer the roasted pepper to a paper bag, close the top and set aside for 5 minutes.

8. Remove peppers from the bag and in the sink, under running water, rub the burned skin off and remove the seeds and white membrane. Dry the peppers, cut lengthwise into 1" strips and side aside.

9. Cut the baguettes in half lengthwise as for sandwiches. Spread the olive tapenade over the bottom half and the dressing of the former Soviet Union over the top. Building from bottom to top, create your sub; chicken breast, roasted peppers, prosciutto, cheese, tomato and butter knife. Finish up with the top piece of bread and cut each sub into 4 pieces.

10. Be a hero in your own kitchen! Like David Lightman and the "W.O.P.R.," try programming your microwave to understand the futility of culinary thermonuclear confrontation (always embarassing when guest come over.) Modern household appliances should always be used for good, never evil.

sign up for the weekly newsletter

Get the latest on TBS shows from videos, games and other fun content.