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wednesday, april 16th
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Tonight
Outback Jack - JD Roberto's Outback Diary
Each week, host JD Roberto gives us the inside scoop on the production of Outback Jack. Get an exclusive, behind-the-scenes peek at this hilarious new reality TV show!

If you've missed an episode, and don't know what JD's talking about, be sure to check out our videos and episode guide from this week.




Episode One, June 22, 2004

Natalie wants to know how many private jets we've chartered for the trip to Australia. If there was ever a doubt, questions like that make it painfully obvious that these twelve girls have no idea what they're getting into. By the time they're sitting at the gate, the thrill of travel is already wearing off. We could have done a whole episode just dealing with their luggage. The girls have their brush with pseudo-celebrity at the airport where Mary accosts Simon Cowell from American Idol. It's the first of many times Mary reminds us of her singing career. If it were up to Simon, Mary would have been voted off the plane. Fortunately for her, the first elimination is still forty-eight hours away.

The girls have an unending list of questions and no one is giving them any information. The rule is, tell them only as much as they absolutely have to know. Otherwise we'll never get 'em on the plane. Fortunately, their biggest concern right now is the location of the nearest Starbucks - and for now that's perfect.

Of course, everyone is still on their best behavior. But you can see them sizing each other up, trying to decide who's going to be their competition.

By the time we land in Sydney, the fatigue and confusion are catching up with them. Natasha spent the better part of the flight in tears (she's afraid of flying). But the planes only get smaller from here on out and we're all genuinely worried about how she's going to handle it.

We're also worried about the skydiving. First off, there's the safety issue: no one's ever thrown twelve city girls out of a plane at 12,000 feet (though at this point some members of the crew are volunteering to help). Secondly, there's the mutiny factor. There's only so far we can push before they all march over to the Quantas ticket counter and demand a seat on the next plane home. No girls, no show. Serious problem.

Having not yet met their bachelor, the girls are all smitten with the their protective detail. (You can't parade twelve gorgeous women around the world without somebody keeping an eye on them.) The bodyguards are all former military, well built and hunky. These guys know eighteen ways to kill you with a spoon, but it may take more than Special Forces training to keep twelve flirty, high-maintenance girls in their rooms and out of trouble. They're doing a great job, but a couple of border collies might have helped with herding.

The language on the jump plane would make Tony Soprano blush. Twelve thousand feet over the outback, our princesses sound like drunken Scottish sailors on shore leave.

But they do jump - screaming, praying and cursing my name - all twelve take the plunge, and thirty minutes later they're on their way to camp.

It's hard to tell what they think of Jack at first glance, but they're definitely focused. The subtle flip of hair, the protruding chest, the extra sway of the hips - it's clearly game on.
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