You can't have a show with David Spade and not have funny lines, and Just Shoot Me is a perfect example. Check out some of Finch's (Spade) hilarious quotes below.

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Just Shoot Me Quotes:

"One more crack like that, and I'll put the M&M's on the high shelf."
- Nina in The Devil and Maya Gallo

"Did you and she....."
"Yeah, and it's so much better when she's there in person!"
- Nina and Wally in Nina's Birthday

"I said I'd put out this damn magazine and that's what I'm gonna do. Sure, you can run off like a bunch of frightened little ants but you know what that would make you? Ants!"
- Maya in Just Shoot Me - Lemon Wacky Hello

"There's a fine line between courting, and stalking. A Connecticut judge once spelled it out for me."
- Finch in King Lear Jet

"The Post Office is issuing commemorative stamps of famous blues musicians, and they're leaving out Cholera Joe Hopper!"
Maybe that's because no one wants to lick something that says 'Cholera.'"
- Nina and Maya in Twice Burned

"It's touching to see what Jack means to all of you, because you certainly don't mean jack to him."
- Dennis in Sweet Charity

"Shoot it, stuff it, hang it on the wall!"
"Crank it, spank it, smack it on the bing-bong!"
- Jack and Finch in Sewer!

"Finch, what are you doing with an NYU newspaper?"
"There's a girl in there I'm stalking. We're gonna get married someday."
- Maya and Finch in Amblushed

"Her face looks like it was put together like a ransom note."
- Finch in The Mask

"Since you talk about Donald Trump so much, why don't you marry him?"
- Elliott in Two Girls For Every Boy

"Where did you get that striped tie? The striped tie store?"
- Nina in Two Girls for Every Boy

"If I wanted to see two queens fight, I would have stayed in the mens room."
- Elliott in How Nina Got Her Groove Back

"You mean there's 100 birds in my office?!"
"Well, 99. One of them drank your "orange juice" and flew into a fan."
- Nina and Finch in Slow Donnie

"What's that filthy thing doing here?"
"Oh c'mon, she works here!"
- Jack and Finch in Slow Donnie

"Isn't there supposed to be an angel on my other shoulder?"
"You're Dennis Finch?"
"Yes."
"Then no."
- Finch and Devil Finch in Toy Story