sullivan and son ALL-NEW TUESDAY AT 10/9c

"Hello, Steven! You look fat!"
- Ok Cha in Last, Best and Final

"I want to say something about Jack. Thirty years ago, I sat in this bar. On that stool. I was drinking whiskey alone. I was pregnant. I had zero idea who the father of my baby was. I mean zero. It could have been anyone!"
- Carol in Last, Best and Final

"There's my baby. My beautiful son, Owen, who is here tonight because this man said 'Carol, you are going to get through this, but not with whiskey.' And he took my drink away. And for 9 months, I did not touch a drop of liquor. I mean, thank God for weed, right?"
- Carol in Last, Best and Final

"Seriously? I can't go to prison. My uncle says I have a 'pretty mouth.'"
- Owen in Last, Best and Final

"I know there's a too young, but is there a too old?"
- Ahmed in Last, Best and Final

"The other night I took out a lovely older lady ... let's just say I got a great parking spot, discount on her dinner, and we were in bed by 8:00. High five!"
- Ahmed in Last, Best and Final

"I think we all know that Sullivan & Son is an institution. My father came here when your father ran the place. Back then, this was a decent neighborhood. Just regular white people."
- Hank in Last, Best and Final

"Let's keep it simple! Scotch and soda, martini, and a draught. Or as I like to call it: breakfast!"
- Carol in Last, Best and Final

"Okay, I know what's going on. It's nostalgia. This is why I never go home, it's depressing."
- Ashley in Last, Best and Final

"I love every minute of it. I love opening up, clearing the taps, wiping the tables, I love the people. I even love fishing Carol's wig out of the toilet."
- Jack in Last, Best and Final

"See this coffee that I'm drinking? There is no Starbucks in this neighborhood. I bought this coffee at a gas station, Steve. It cost $1. Coffee's supposed to cost $4, that's how you know it's good!"
- Ashley in Last, Best and Final

"One time, I lost 'Raisin Or Not A Raisin,' but then I won 'He Didn't Keep It Down.'"
- Owen in The Bribe

"Psst! Hank! Check it out! I need you to be my wingman. You’re my brother, your body's rejecting your baboon heart, you've only got a week left, and you want to die happy knowing your sister got some."
- Karen in The Bribe

"I thought I'd hate having you home, but it's kind of fun watching Mom take a dump on you every day."
- Susan in The Bribe

"Susan! Put your hair back the other way! You're showing too much face."
- Ok Cha in The Bribe

"My water broke over there. I served drinks till you crowned!"
- Ok Cha in The Bribe

"I can't go home. Home's where my wife is. She's a beautiful woman but if you stare at her long enough her hair turns to snakes."
- Roy in The Bribe

"Oh-ho. You will call. With a little bitch tone in your voice."
- Ok Cha in The Bribe

"I got news for you son, she already has all the control. And when she's done with this world she will control the next whichever world that is. Probably hell, because she'll want to be reunited with her family."
- Jack in The Bribe

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